Aar and Sar's Blog

The Kingdom Is Faith and Family

Sun, 12 Oct 2025 04:54:42 GMT

"He Gently Leads Those With Young."

��Story time!

Here I am, 16 weeks pregnant with our fourth little one! We didn’t know if we’d have another, with constant transition and the many challenges it is raising a family abroad while working in ministry, having a baby from our own capacity wasn’t an option, it had to be Him who spoke and gave. That is all we knew.

Rewind to spring of 2024, we knew we were moving to pioneer and live in the countryside of Japan. We began vision trips to see where that would take us. Aaron one day came to me and said, “I’ve really been praying and feel we are to have one more child.” I was surprised and honestly scared of the thought, pregnancy hasn’t been an easy one for me and feeling weak in my body during pregnancy and postpartum was challenging enough, but add on the burden of language learning and transition, it seemed too much. But we prayed, I trusted Aaron heard God and we tried. In prayer I heard a name and as I walked past Aaron’s Bible, it was open to the book of the name I had just heard. Aaron was surprised and hadn’t been reading in that location. Shortly after I had a dream in the night that I was pregnant with one baby but got pregnant with the next just a few months later, I knew both were good but carrying the second child would cause the first a harder time and less growth being born at the same time. Overall the feeling was, it was good despite that and both would be okay. “Could this be the conception and birth of a new ministry AND another child?!” I wondered. The door of my heart opened a little more to the idea of another life.

Many months pass, each time trying while feeling nervous and uncertain for my heart, but still leaning in. But no baby. A year passes by and now I’m certain, it must be God who gives this gift and it must be his timing, if it's His will. Baby or no baby, lack or abundance, we will choose contentment and trust. It’s now spring in Japan, we’ve found our future town and everything from our life is being packed into boxes as we prepare for a 4 month trip across the world, after leaving our home of the last 4 years. Soon we will leave Japan to Australia and around America, nearing 30 homes in that short yet long span of time. Coming “home” to Japan, 4 months later, yet not home. We must find a new one. We must start over again. I dream in the night of the birth of our next child, very vividly, and it was shortly after our move to Uchiko. Surely this wouldn’t be his timing? But the dream, so vivid. The door cracking open more.

We spent the most refreshing and beautiful week in Australia, soaking in time around a big beautiful table where got to sit back and watch the legacy of family do it’s thing, it was marking. I knew this is what we are made for, the kingdom, it is family. Over and over throughout scripture I began to see how He wove it together, Him as the Father, us as His children, and the church as brothers and sisters- a kingdom Family. When the world says beginning again and having more children "slows you down" or "stops the important work", the word says, "Children are a gift, a blessing from Him." We see Family was and is still His idea. Even if another child came, it would add to the kingdom, not delay or stop the “important work”. God solidified his heart for family here. My heart stretched more and continued to open, moment by moment while grasping more God's heart.

Landing on US soil, meltdowns and jet lag cries at 1am, I heard the Lord- "you can do hard things. You were made for this. Just one more." Now it’s Sunday morning and we are worshipping, again the little whisper, “I want you to have another child. Open your heart.”

“But God, I don’t normally need to know I’ve for sure heard you but this time, I really need to know this is you. This timing feels scary. My capacity low. I need confirmation,” I respond. I quickly pack up to leave and as I walk out of the room a woman runs after me. “I’ve never been here before,” she begins, “I heard God say to come to this church this morning. I was a missionary in Japan and I wanted to say before you leave, I see a baby in your womb and God using this child in this next season.” Boom, confirmation within minutes. But if that wasn’t enough God furthered it with a friend dreaming in the night “I saw you taking a pregnancy test while in America before returning home, it was positive!” She didn’t know a thing. But if it was God, it has to be his gift and his timing. Now my heart is open, still scared and uncertain but open nonetheless.

Months go by, traveling and moving is constant, not really trying but trusting, and now here we are- less then three weeks from flying across the world again and this time to find and move to our new home, Uchiko. I’m not late on my period but it’s dad's 81st birthday celebration with my family in Georgia. Why not just test and if it’s positive, it’d be a fun surprise gift I think. Another grandchild… 17th I think. As I wait, I whisper “your will be done”. Minutes pass and a positive word appears on the screen. He gave His gift in… His timing. Shocked that it was now, just weeks before heading home, undone and thankful for the gift.

We shared the news first with our children. “What’s in the bag as a gift? It’s really cool,” we say. They take guesses. Liam first, “uhh dynamite.” Ella’s up next, “a new toothbrush!” At least they got the shape right. “A candy wrapper,” Remi chimes in. Apparently we give cool but strange gifts. As we share the news of the baby, they are overjoyed. Remi a bit unsure and asking to shrink back into our baby but also excited for a baby that’s “hers”.

The last couple weeks were a blur as we had the joy of sharing with our family stateside and then our missional family, Iris.

Now at just 6 weeks pregnant we are boarding the plane with more luggage than we left with on our move to Japan five years earlier and our three children for 30 hours of travel. After landing we had less then 24 hours before Aaron was headed on his way to Uchiko to find us a home and pave the way for us to move cross country two weeks later. The week that unfolded was one of the most challenging times, jet lag with three kids, solo parenting and… first trimester nausea coming in like a bomb along with insomnia. Wow. It was the hottest week of the year but I knew having my first ultrasound before leaving Tokyo was my next important step. I had begun bleeding and the dizzy spells were coming with intensity. A friend came to babysit the kids and I decided to go for a 7 week ultrasound without Aaron (while he was still in Uchiko). All the doctor would say was a few words in broken English “I see no baby.” “Come back 2 weeks for abortion or natural pregnancy.” No answers for the bleeding or solution for the dizzy spells, just the word “nothing.” No fetus, no heartbeat, an empty womb but a friend of faith beside me. As she sat there she began to say, “I feel you need to look back at the words spoken from God over this baby and believe them.”

The next two weeks felt like forever as I had tissue and spots of blood coming out as I wiped. This was a miscarriage right? As I shared with professionals I knew, each confirmed this was what the beginnings of a miscarriage would be. For two days my symptoms of nausea began to fade. I could hardly believe the week we were packing up everything and moving to a rural part of Japan with what was to be a child prophesied and given to us just weeks early, now being miscarried. My head spun in wonderings of what that week would look like, how could we pack up and unpack and drive cross country while my body pushed out a dead baby. Where would I go? Who are the doctors? How will I speak with them? What will happen in my body? What about the words spoken? What is this? It was quite confusing, yet still many stepped up and prayed. Many spoke up and said, “don’t loose faith.” It was now 2 days before moving, my follow up appointment had arrived. Within moments of the ultrasound beginning, I saw it, the heartbeat! And a perfectly healthy baby measuring exactly two weeks later- 9 weeks old.

I can't say for certain what all happened that day, except that this child already has quite the story and our faith was stretched as the grace of God and his kindness carried us. We now have a baby arriving March, 2026. And this is just the beginning of this child’s story. I can’t imagine what else will be written. If I’ve learned anything, it’s that His timing and ways are not our ways, they’re higher and mysterious and trustworthy and above all, His Kingdom is Family and Children are the gift.

McKisic baby #4 due March 27th 2026!

COUNTING THE COSTS AND PARENTHOOD

sar.mckisic@gmail.com (Sarah McKisic) — Mon, 06 Jun 2022 09:53:11 GMT

THE PROCESS

5/20/2022

This week had some really beautiful moments within the mundane of sickness and routine. From walks along the river to buy groceries with the kids spotting all the flowers, insects, lizards and baby ducks. Spending time making lunch together while the kids “cut” the veggies. Hearing Remi “tell us cool stories” and give us her big smiles when we smile at her. Worshipping under the breezy trees while our kids run around in the yard.

This week had some deep hitting moments for my heart. There are a lot of things you don’t know when “counting the costs” as much as you try. As I spent time on a call with Liam’s teacher this week, she in very broken English tried to explain how Liams adjusting to school, only to spend the quick 15 minutes sharing concerning and negative things. We live in a culture that “hammers down the nail that sticks out” or “cuts down the flower that stands tall above the rest” with the intention of everyone looking and being the same. My heart feels a bit scared for my son who for them “is different.” He speaks another language, prefers to play alone in the thing that interests him, wants to run free and barefoot, doesn’t color within the lines and spends a portion of his time playing as different characters and in his imagination. These things are scary for others but not for me. Because while it may be different then the majority here, he is still a kid. A kid that loves play. A kid that loves freedom. My boy that is kind, sensitive, encouraging and loving. This week at bedtime he broke down weeping in my arms in a way I’ve never seen before and said “mommy, when you were a little girl did you ever try to leave your classroom when you were angry?” And so we talked about his anger and why it was there and he broke. His perceived anger just sadness and I’m sure confusion on how hard this is. Just a few days before we were talking through school options and Aaron asked him about his current school. At first he was saying he has fun. Aaron then asked what he thought about attending an English speaking school to which he replied, “Oh, an English speaking school? That would definitely be way better.” All of this has been interesting to process. One side of me wants to let him press into the challenge and grow if it’s a safe environment (which I do believe everyone is well meaning and safe there). Another side wants to wrap him up in a blanket and keep him close so he can’t be molded or changed by the pressures, high expectations and shame the culture wants to place on little children here. And the other just reminds myself that “Jesus knows and we can rest in Him when we don’t have the answers because they too will come.”

This is just apart of the journey I didn’t expect. The costs I didn’t know were there till we are paying it, all the while aware that God is still worthy of it. A cost my children didn’t choose but one God is so aware of and gracious in. So we do what we know to do, surrender more, press in for wisdom, and pray for provisions and favor for where He’s leading. He is a kind God fully aware of every future moment and solution. He is a Holy God worth every sacrifice and hard ship. He is a good good Father ready to parent alongside us. And for that I am thankful.

—

6/6/2022

This last week we pressed into prayer, dreaming for our children and future here, and allowed ourselves to ask God for things we once didn’t have faith for. We stepped out on a limb and toured the international christian school that is only a 5 minute walk from our home. (CAJ) They asked us to apply and we talked through options for Liam. The facility is remarkable and Liam is eager to go. We found out yesterday that our landlords grandfather was once a teacher there. This is an area we are believing God will provide for if it is what He has in store for Liam. It’s roughly $8,500 for his first year of school registration and attendance fees. This school is taught in english by all Christian staff and is grades K-12th. If you feel led to partner with us for this need, we’d love to talk and share more! An area we have been navigating for the last year and a half now feels like an exciting place to dream and see what God will do.

- Sarah McKisic

Christian Academy of Japan Photos

OVERWHELMING VICTORY IS YOURS

sar.mckisic@gmail.com (Sarah McKisic) — Tue, 29 Mar 2022 05:47:42 GMT

As a mom, I see my children do things that are reflections of me. As a wife, I see things that are a reflection of my mom. In life we all walk through traumas and hardships and pick things up along the way. We carry our past into our futures and do things we once said we’d never do. I see my son respond in ways that Sarah once did at the young age of 5. The GOOD and the BAD, I see it in myself and them, they're reflections. As we add another innocent and beautiful child into our hands that we are to steward and raise in love, I have to ask myself, what do I want them to see in me and reflect. What will I allow in and what has to stop with me? What do I have to wage war on today so my children don’t have to? What does God has for me to walk in victory in so that my children can go further and deeper in Him? And if we were having coffee I’d ask you those same questions. Often times these questions spark awareness of how much we truly need Jesus and His fullness for our lives. When we decide that today’s the day we will press in for the more, we are also saying yes to pioneering new paths that weren’t there before. It takes work and humility. It takes failing and trying again. It takes forgiveness and grace. But we can’t stop because it’s hard. We must wage war on anything that’s less then what He has for us and future generations! So if you want to start this conversation, find a safe friend and buckle up. Get ready to find God’s grace and victory in exchange for your sin and mess. Let’s do this ��

“No, despite all these things, overwhelming victory is ours through Christ, who loved us.” Romans 8:37

— OVERWHELMING VICTORY IS YOURS TODAY! Don’t wait around for things to change, wage war on the things you don’t want to stay around.

REMI'S BIRTH STORY

sar.mckisic@gmail.com (Sarah McKisic) — Fri, 04 Mar 2022 03:31:35 GMT

“I thank you for all that You've done, I thank You for all that You do, I thank you for all that You've done

And all that is to come, all that is to come.”

Nine whole days of Remi Brooke (麗美). Today while it’s fresh on my mind and our dear friend is on a date with the older kids, I will share the beginning of her story. It begins where Ella’s birth story left off, the day after her birth when Aaron lightheartedly said “I want two more.” Growing up I had always said that if God wills it I’d love to have a little boy then two girls. However, throughout my second pregnancy, we spoke as if this was the last and I approached everything with that in mind. After a whirlwind of birth and bouts of postpartum depression and anxiety, I vowed I wouldn't ever do that again. Because if I did, would my body and mind crumble? Fast forward to the beginning of 2021, we were three months into settling into our new home in Japan and the conversation began again. What about having another? What if it would be different? So I pressed into the prodding from my husband and the Lord. My heart was challenged and the sacrifice it’d be physically, emotionally, and time-wise I knew would be A LOT, especially while in a new land. But then Jesus entered the conversation as He enjoys doing. He shared His thoughts and insights. In the famous Psalm 23, it says, “ The LORD is my shepherd, I shall not be in want. He makes me lie down in green pastures, he leads me beside quiet waters, he restores my soul. He guides me in paths of righteousness for his name's sake. Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for you are with me; your rod and your staff, they comfort me. You prepare a table before me in the presence of my enemies. You anoint my head with oil; my cup overflows. Surely goodness and love will follow me all the days of my life, and I will dwell in the house of the LORD forever.” He immediately reassured me that one, He makes me lie down in green pastures and beside quiet waters. And two, even WHEN I walk in the valley He will come in with comfort, sustenance to sustain me at His table, and my cup will pour out from His overflow. I knew at this moment, my fears had to bow to His truths. He asked me questions like “What if it’s different this time? What if your next child is peaceful and I’m leading you beside quiet waters? What if it’s not, would you still follow my lead and let me be present with you in the valley? What have you already overcome?” Even when I didn’t know who she was yet, I knew He was saying she’d be a person that embodies His peace and beauty. With this in mind, I gave Him my yes and we began trying. Three months into pregnancy after facing some of the hardest sickest weeks of my life, I finally felt well enough to get out of the house and have family time. During our outing we had another curve ball come when I began profusely bleeding in an arcade. I rushed to the nearest restroom as blood fell to the floor and ended up on the basement floor of a pachinko parlor filled with smoke and wept in the bathroom. Our team began praying and Liam looked at me as he accessed the situation and said, “I have an idea mom, what if Holy Spirit comes?!” and we prayed for Him to come. The time that followed felt like forever as we waited for an ambulance to make its way to Shibuya crossing to pick me up. Ella held my hand and was emotional and processed that moment for months after. Being in an ambulance alone with no idea what they were asking or saying in Japanese was scary. Once arriving at the dr we found her heartbeat and a blood clot in my uterus that had burst. Such relief rushed over me and Aaron soon arrived at the dr to meet me and hear the news. A few weeks later, before I found out her gender, I had a dream of Ella where she was older and was walking hand in hand with a little sister. I heard the phrase, “I’m giving you a bell.” In the highs and lows of pregnancy, His truth spoke of who He was creating in my womb. She will be a woman of peace, beauty, and will also boldly and loudly proclaim His freedom and truth across this land. Birthing her here in our new home feels incredibly significant and sacred.

Nine whole days of Remi Brooke. Today we see her on the other side, one year later after His prodding and questions, after a sacrifice and scares in pregnancy and we have a healthy new life made in the image of Him. Remi (beauty) Brooke (peace), we have seen just the beginning of both of those things in my delivery and her.

February fifteenth of two thousand twenty-two she came in the peace of our Japanese home in Higashikurume, Tokyo, Japan. My contractions began at 2:30 am, on the day of hitting 38 weeks. Our Japanese midwife (助産師) figured with it being our third birth and the last being just 3 hours that I’d have her rather quickly. The weeks leading up we began praying and welcoming her to come with prophetic songs and dreaming with the Lord of what we wanted her birth to be. Ever since I was young I dreamt of supernatural birth. The two things I kept feeling was she’d come delivered by the Prince of Peace and in a place of worship. My delivery being my offering and sacrifice, my yes. Worshipping and thanking Him in each contraction and moments between. Around 3:45 am, my midwife came and the tatami room was set for her to arrive with our worship music playing softly in the background. My midwife checked my progress and I was at 5cm. Soon my contractions began to slow down and we just continued to rest and worship. I kept coming back to the song “Thank You” by Upperroom.

“I thank you for all that You've done

I thank You for all that You do

I thank you for all that You've done

And all that is to come, all that is to come.”

I knew that this labor would be a time of surrender to what He had and my strength was going to be found in keeping thankfulness on my lips. With contractions now 10-15 minutes apart but still stronger pressure with each new one, I’d lean into my birth ball and in my mind thank Him for each new wave and her birth coming with peace. My midwife soon left being unsure if I was in active labor and things picked up again. Our kids woke up at 4:30 am probably aware that something significant was taking place and around 6 am our friend arrived to be with them. Ella, two years old, kept sharing with me the weeks leading up that “I will be by your side all night and take care of you. I promise.” but then the day before while sitting at the dinner table blurted out, “Mommy, birth is too scary for me. Daddy will be with and I will play with Mrs. Lorelei.” So playing is what they did and fun dates to the coffee and park. (If you read this Lorelei, thank you so much for caring for our kids during my birth and times after!!! So special having you there to pray during labor and be one of the first people to meet her!) Around 10 am we made the call to have everyone go home and labor alone for a while since my contractions weren't consistent enough but still confident she’d arrive at some point that day and right on time. While the kids rested Aaron led us in worship on the guitar (my favorite part!) By 1:30 pm the contractions were finally five minutes apart, about an hour later, my midwife decided to come again… and guess what.. they slowed down AGAIN back to 10-15 minutes apart. I couldn’t believe it but felt thankful for the breaks that allowed me to stay in a place of worship and peace in my mind. She checked and I was at 8-9cm but my body wasn't ready to push. Lorelei came back to be with the kids for the afternoon and on it went. Finally, around 6 pm they grew much stronger and the secondary midwife arrived along with the midwife from church who offered to translate. With every contraction, Aaron would speak God’s truth over me that He was delivering her in peace and my midwives would do counter pressure and massage me. The level of attentiveness was amazing. Somewhere around 7 pm (I wasn't looking at clocks!) my water broke and pushing began. By this point, my legs and hips felt weary from leaning on them and into Aaron. The pain began as I started to push but there were two pushes that I felt no pain in and I felt Jesus lock eyes on me and showed me leading her down. I won’t lie though, it got intense at the end and my body felt incredibly tired. While pushing I even yelled out accidentally in Japanese “痛いよう” meaning “this is painful” and we all laughed. Luckily in no time, with my midwife doing counter pressure, and a few pushes she came out, and WITH NO TEAR! This felt like a huge victory as in previous births I had longer recoveries from that area and in Ella’s labor, it was a huge fear point for me. At 7:10 pm on 2/15/2022 (Tokyo Time) out came Remi Brooke, 3,360grams (7.4lbs) and 49cm long! Moments after Aaron brought the kids down to meet her and the giddiness and uncertainty on their faces are looks I’ll never forget. Liam’s first words were “wow, she is so pretty” and Ella asks “Daddy, can I sit on your lap so I can see her?” because she wants to see her but not get too close. Watching the kids love on her has to be the best part. Her first week of life has been so peaceful and my body has felt incredible. She’s my first baby without colic or hours of screaming. He is so faithful and I can’t wait to see who she becomes as she shines His beauty and peace in Japan, our home, and family.

Psalm 27:4

One thing have I asked of the LORD, that will I seek after: that I may dwell in the house of the LORD all the days of my life, to gaze upon the beauty of the LORD and to inquire in his temple.

(In Japanese the word for beauty here has the same れ as Remi)

Remi when you read this one day I want you to know that we love you and we believe you will be a worshipper who gazes upon His beauty in the temple all the days of your life. You are a carrier of His peace and beauty and will be a bell of His truth in this nation you were delivered in and to the ends of the earth. You are worth every sacrifice and I’d give Jesus my yes all over again to get this time to know and love you. Love you much, Mama.

One Year In Japan

sar.mckisic@gmail.com (Sarah McKisic) — Fri, 22 Oct 2021 08:06:35 GMT

Yesterday (10/18) was our ONE YEAR in Japan. It’s hard to believe that much time has passed and amidst what is hard about living in a foreign land, we still feel full of hope and gratitude. The Japanese people are on the heart of God and saying yes is the best thing we get to daily do.

October has been incredibly full in the best ways possible. Meetings as a team, outreaches on Tuesday in the city, searching for a building and dreaming with the church, and a full house on Saturday nights for worship. God has continually shown up touching His people and the unbelievers we reach out to.

On Tuesday we prayed over some people in the streets, one particular girl was weeping as she felt the presence of God. On Friday we hosted our pastor and translator / friend and team at our home, it was a wonderful time together. Saturday we had new people join us for worship night and dinner with 25 people in total, two being unbelievers. The kids are having a kid service upstairs where they have left feeling inspired and sharing Jesus with their friends at school. One man Aaron met on the train who does not know Jesus yet has been wanting to meet to learn the bible from Him and even joined us last weekend. Our sweet neighbor came as well who said she could tell Jesus was present in us and our home and felt Him. On Monday night Aaron taught on a teaching zoom on the church. Today after worshipping and meeting with our team I spontaneously bought flowers on my commute home for my neighbor (the one mentioned above) to which she showed me the christian books and bible she has. We then sat and talked about her favorite verses, questions she has, and what salvation is. And this was only one week. He has shown up every single day of this last year in countless ways and I could weep thinking of how good He is.

As we dream for this next year we know there is something significant about our team and this home. With our team we are praying into what a church will look like and where it will be, what outreaches to pursue weekly, and how to continue growing together and in God. In our home many have shared they feel it is a key place God wants to use for ministry and we couldn’t agree more. We are 3 steps away from a public nursery school that Liam now attends that many busy parents and single moms have their kids (most from 730am-630pm) and we are getting to know them slowly. Our dream is to set up our home to continue hosting Saturday worship nights, kid service, cafe space for all the moms to come rest while the kids play and hear about Jesus, potential house church a few times a month, many meals hosted, and friends/family/missionaries for periods of time. Our goal is to also get a better grasp of the language so we have no hinderance in sharing the gospel, something we daily desire to do in all the places we go!!

All in all we know this is just the beginning of what He is going to do. We are humbled and thankful for everyone who has been supporting us! Happy one year to us all, we did it together. One year down, many more to come.

With love,

-The McKisic’s

February, The Invitation They've Been Waiting For

sar.mckisic@gmail.com (Sarah McKisic) — Mon, 07 Jun 2021 08:37:36 GMT

“Are you confused about life, don’t know what’s going on? Come with me, oh come, have dinner with me!” - Proverbs 9:4-5

Hey friend! Have you ever had one of those chapters in scripture you can’t stop reading, every time you go back it seeps in a little deeper. I don’t know about you, but this is the one for me. When I read Proverbs 9 I want to immediately stop what I’m doing, go to Shibuya crossing (the worlds busiest pedestrian crossing with up to 3,000 people crossing at one time!!) and invite everyone within the sound of my voice to come have dinner with me. Some facts about Japan you may not know, it is obviously not a third world country but is a nation with 99% of the population not knowing Jesus and it has some of the world’s highest suicide rates with 21,000 people who took their lives last year alone. Many Japanese are so lonely they will pay others just to sit and talk to them or hold their hand. There are actually places called Snack Bars where people go to have someone listen to them. There are people who rent themselves out for $100 and will spend time with strangers who are desperate to be heard. I can’t shake the feeling that God is moving much similar to how He did in Acts, around the table and in family. Much like Lady Wisdom, we want to have our home ready, the table set, and to see others leave their impoverished confusion and really live. I’d like to have you join us in prayer for souls, for the harvest of Japan. This week we will be hosting another dinner in our studio apartment in the heart of Tokyo. We will be inviting in the non-believers we have spent the last four months getting to know. Please pray with us for God to move, for hearts to be fertile soil. Everything in us is eager to see what He will do. It’s the kindness of Jesus that draws us to repentance. As we prepare we know the importance of prayer and that it is only Him who can save a soul. As you go about your week, I want to ask you to put Japan and our ministry in your prayers. Join us in asking God for the harvest and for these beautiful people we are inviting in this week. As always, thanks for being here with us and partnering with us. Blessings,

-The McKisic’s

Prayer Needs:

Salvations and hearts open to the gospel
For our friends who need healing from covid & some friends looking for jobs
Liam to be accepted for financing from the city & all up front costs for school

Testimonies:

A woman who came for Friday night prayer was healed of colon cancer!!
Many new and seasoned believers in the church are receiving an increase in prayer and being encouraged. They are coming to Friday nights and leaving with breakthrough and deeper connection with Jesus
We are having some non-believers asking about who our God is and opportunity to share about our Jesus! Believing it’s just the beginning to what He is doing
Last month a friend here finalized their adoption of their sweet boy. Before getting him they had a name for a kid picked out and meaning and the son they were given has that exact name!!

May, Increasing Capacity and Balancing the Gifts

sar.mckisic@gmail.com (Sarah McKisic) — Mon, 07 Jun 2021 08:36:55 GMT

“Therefore welcome one another as Christ has welcomed you, for the glory of God.”

Romans 15:7

May, a month of increased capacity, rebalancing, and waiting on the Lord. We are at a point of holy frustration. Aware of the more, God dreams within sight, and yet a knowing that we mustn’t rush ahead. Waiting upon God for every detail, provision, and idea while shedding our own. He is the one we are here for, for His glory and His will. So we slowly build and care for the things He has given us; our families, our Iris team, 21ccc church, and the ones we are discipling, worshipping with, and inviting in for meals. Those are the key focuses for us in this season with time spent in the presence the highest of all. Many more meals were had, times of going deeper in the word with hungry new believers, team worship nights and sleepovers, and growing in connecting in family and marriage.

In the coming months we will be transitioning to move to a residential part of Tokyo, called Nerima, near our Iris Cross Culture team. It is a little over an hour by train from where we are currently living. We also have hopes to start a summer outreach, rent a space for weekly meetings to worship with unbelievers and hungry ones, and build more closely as a team. We’d love to have space for a Japanese person or family to live with us for discipleship/ministry and language learning, space to hosts many more meals with the unbelievers we are getting to know, and space for a cafe space to open up to those in our neighborhood. We have seen others in Japan see many saved from a garage cafe and we have a dream to open up our space even more to invite others in for community, love, and conversation. God has great plans as we move to this new area. Giving away our things and moving here to Japan was the first offering and dream, now we are stepping into the next layer and are very expectant to dream bigger with Him.

As always please reach out if we can pray for you in anyway. We love you and we are thankful for you! See below for some of our current prayer needs, a place to support if you feel led to partner us in this next step, a May video recap, and a screenshot of an email update sent from Iris! Bless you,

- The McKisic’s

Some Key Areas to Pray for:

Housing and the right person to move in with us and join our team!

Financial provision for the move, new monthly costs, and cafe/hosting space

Grace for us and the kids in transition (paperwork and setting up to go smoothly)

For us to all quickly get the Japanese language

To know what and who God is calling us to invest time and money into

Unified and strengthening in our team as we build and pioneer

SALVATIONS!! we want to see many encounter Jesus and hungry believers to give God their all.

Wisdom for discipleship and knowledge of the word of God

April, The Month of God Bringing the People

sar.mckisic@gmail.com (Sarah McKisic) — Mon, 07 Jun 2021 08:32:17 GMT

April! It was a month of God bringing the people and milestones for our family! We began the month with Liam starting all Japanese kindergarten, celebrated 6 months of living here, and celebrated Ella’s second birthday! This past month we also saw many hungry new people come humbly asking to be discipled. Many wanting to dive deeper into the word, grow in hearing God’s voice, and be activated to do ministry. There were some late nights of outreach, worship, and hosting hungry new believers and unbelievers in our home. If you know me, you know I am not one for late nights, but sitting there hearing people ask questions about God late into the night and saying, “I want you to teach me,” really changes things. I mean, I still don’t like being up late but this is why we are here. This is why we came. For these moments.

Celebrating Ella turning 2!

We ended March with a team retreat where we worshiped, prayed, and dreamed as an Iris team. Lorelei shared she saw a picture of people coming in like the waves and that we need to make space for all the people God wants to bring. April was the start of that with nine people coming to Aaron and I for discipleship. We are now making space and time to meet with them weekly!

This month we have felt God highlighting worship. Bringing us to this place of focusing on God in all we do and offering Him worship in that place. Worshiping Him with guitar and song before Liam’s school days, worshipping Him in the coffee shop conversations with the many many people God has opened up to us, worshipping in the cleaning of the dirty kitchen or in the training during tantrums with our children. It can all be worship if we let it. This month we have begun to dive deeper into the word, making our one focus Him.

Scripture says, salvation comes only from God. It is His kindness that draws people to repentance. From delighting in His instruction and law, fruit comes in its season. Focusing on Him keeps us green and ripe, prospering in areas we never could prosper on our own. As much as we believe in what He is doing here through us, we know it all starts with worship and fixed eyes on our beloved. From Him the rest flows.

From this place of worship we have jumped into the start of recording youtube training videos and plan to launch our own channel for training and equipping the church body. We are now meeting with nine people weekly (sometimes twice a week!) for discipleship and are inviting others into our home that are open and hungry for the gospel. Many meals were had and discussions on who Jesus is, for the unbeliever and believer. This month we had a picnic with a family we met at the coffee shop and she opened up sharing they have it all yet don’t feel they are living for anything. They feel no purpose in life. Aaron was able to share the gospel and how we live for eternity. It was the beginning of a conversation of Jesus we hope to continue having as we build relationship. This is one of the many conversations we are having with unbelievers. There have been times of praying and sharing Jesus with Japanese people on the streets that are highlighted to us or approach us because they want to practice english or see our kids. Both have opened doors and we find many people afraid and carrying heavy burdens during this pandemic to which we can pray for God to protect and carry them through it. On Friday nights we are leading worship nights with the Barbutti family and have one special family coming weekly who are so on fire for Jesus. There’s no doubt God’s bringing the people and we want to continue to find ways to receive them, love them where they are at, and invest in them.

We are beginning to dream and discuss ideas for a house church, Iris training school this summer (maybe online due to covid), and assisting where we can in building the Iris Cross Culture NGO here in Japan so we can one day bring over missionaries! Please pray for refined vision and ideas that are from God so we can be about His work and not our own. Life is full and we are thankful we can be here in such a time as this. Japan is on the heart of God and we can feel the compassion he has for the Japanese. If you’d like to partner with us to see the kingdom advanced in Japan please read the bullet points below!! God is expanding here and we are so excited to be apart of what He is doing and inviting others in to be apart too!

With love,

The McKisic’s

Partner with us in prayer:

God to touch and lead to salvation the unbelievers we hosts for meals, pray for in the streets, and connect with in our community

That God would continue giving us a clear vision on what to put our time and attention to so we can be about His purposes and plans

For our next steps building as a team, for God to open doors and give us favor

For all our financial needs to expand the kingdom here

Soft hearts and God to go before us in all we do

Grace for Liam’s schooling and language for us all

Partner with us financially:

We are looking to expand our ministry! We currently have enough coming in monthly to hosts a few dinners a month and meet our monthly living expenses. Our hopes are to move this fall to a part of Tokyo that is near our Iris team so we can build deeper and more with them. This has been the goal all along but we have been waiting on timing. In this case we will no longer have the church covering majority of our rent costs and will need to raise more funds. We would like to rent a home where we can hosts those who want to be discplied, people who visit for missions, and friends and family who come over (and have a bedroom for our kids ha!). In addition to this we want to begin opening our home up more often and have some really fun dreams on what that will look like!! We are $800 away from our monthly goal and need 8 people to join us at $100 a month or a few people to join at an annual amount of $9,600. If you have been following along and praying about joining a missionaries team we would love to have you apart of what God is doing here (no matter the amount!)

March, Deeper Connection

sar.mckisic@gmail.com (Sarah McKisic) — Mon, 07 Jun 2021 08:26:58 GMT

I hope this first month of Spring has been a refreshing one for you and your loved ones! I pray it has ushered in a fresh hope for this year and what’s ahead, as I know the sunshine and spring blooms often does. If it hasn’t, I pray that in the coming weeks God brings the refreshing you need. The month of March brought us the end of a three month lockdown and the beautiful parks of Tokyo reopening for the Sakura blossoms. They are far more mesmerising then I anticipated and our streets are lined with the trees in full bloom. Life is beginning to feel more normal here but every new season is a first and brings something different for us to experience.

We are soaking up the beautiful weather and greatly anticipating our youngest girl turning two in one week! We will have a 花見 for her birthday party which means flower viewing, where you have a big picnic under the Sakura trees. The blossoms are beginning to fall off and dance in the wind which is something they call 花吹雪 (flower snow storm) and it shows that summer is soon on its way! Along with our youngest turning two, our oldest son starts Kindergarten next week at an all Japanese school!! This is big for us as it will help him learn the language and free up time for more ministry time and language learning time for us. Anyways, March was a month full to the brim so I’ll make the main points bold if you want a quicker update ;)

Somethings we have always talked about are discipleship, hosting meals in our home, and outreach, all of which started this past month! We have had two teenagers (that we met at our Friday night services) begin to meet weekly with us to be discipled. They are so hungry for God and the girl I am meeting with even joined us for her first ever outreach! We walked alongside her in hearing God’s voice and prayed for a few people in the streets. One place we were led to for outreach is called Kabukicho which is a famous red light district in Shinjuku, Tokyo. We heard a story of a girl who is a prostitute there that sells herself for $5. Utterly heartbreaking, but we know God is gracious and wants to reach out with redemption for many other girls like her. This area is right outside of the worlds busiest train station with 3.5 million people going through it per day. This month we have more people joining us in outreach including an interpreter so we are excited to see how God will move. Along with these areas of ministry, we have also been asked by the Church to start our own Youtube channel and podcasts. This will begin this week! Our Friday night services were reaching about 600 people across Japan through live recordings. In replacement of Friday nights we will begin to record videos in advance and air them every Wednesday to hopefully continue to reach those who are unable to attend church amidst covid19!

Hosting meals around our table is another value for us and we continued inviting in the baristas from the local Blue Bottle and others we feel God highlighting in our neighbourhood. We have also connected with other believers in our church and missionaries in the Tokyo area. With every meal we do not force any of our beliefs upon them, rather invite them in to love on them and yet every time a conversation about the gospel arises and is initiated by them. I believe God is stirring their hearts and wooing them. We will continue to make space and time for these people we have come to love so much and pray God fills it. Other baristas from the other Blue Bottles have come to know us as the “taco party” people and word has gotten out about our house parties! It is uncommon to invite others into your home here, but we believe this is what God has created us and them for, to be in family. Any opportunity to come over they eagerly accept. Please continue praying for them!

We just returned yesterday from our first Iris Retreat where as a team we prayed, worshipped, dreamed, and planned for what we are building together. Let’s just say I cried when sharing how this team is something Aaron and I have dreamed about for a long time and we have so much anticipation for what we are about to dive into. We have longed to be in a community that both challenges and encourages, that presses into the more of God and radically pursues His call. When saying yes to God I knew it could mean a lonely and challenging road but instead He brought us the Barbutti family to pioneer with. With that brings so much beautiful and painful things because it means we are truly doing life together and for that I’m grateful. Sign me up for all of it.

All in all, March was a month of God’s goodness and we know April will be too. We’d love to have you all continuing praying for Liam’s transition into an all Japanese Kindergarten, for God to show up in our discipleship, outreach, podcasts, and hosting times, and for God to continue providing us with vision and team unity as we pioneer. With love,

The McKisic’s

January, Testimonies in Japan

sar.mckisic@gmail.com (Sarah McKisic) — Mon, 07 Jun 2021 08:17:58 GMT

Somehow we are already halfway through the first month of the year and it’s been a bumpy ride for most of us, if not all. If you’re in that boat of bumpiness, I want to bring some hope into your corner of the world. This is one of the darkest times many of us have seen and yet I can’t get Psalm 139:11-12 out of my head. So I’ll put it right here for you, if you too need to get this truth in and around you today.

“Then I said to myself, “Oh, he even sees me in the dark!

At night I’m immersed in the light!”

It’s a fact: darkness isn’t dark to you;

night and day, darkness and light, they’re all the same to you.”

Where ever you are, and however dark it may feel, He sees you in it. The darkness has not overcome Him and it shall not overcome you. Even in the dark, He is still moving and in fact now is the time for us to shine bright for all of the world to see. Maybe it’s cliche, but it’s the truth that you and I get to stand firm in this season. I’d like to share with you some ways God has been moving here in Japan and if you need God to show up for you in the same way, I declare that my testimony would become yours. That the living and all powerful God, would move with breakthrough in your life. Take it for yourself, ask God to do it again for you, and bask in the hope of Jesus.

Testimony of breakthrough in health and longevity

My grandma is 100 years old today and within the last week overcame COVID! They put her in hospice after she tested positive but soon moved her out when she was doing well and eating good. She is now COVID free and celebrating a big birthday!

Testimony of provision and partnerships

We have been living at 60% funded the last few months here in Japan and every month God has provided above and beyond our basic needs with people giving spontaneous gifts or above their monthly amount. We have been able to meet our own needs, support a few other missionaries, and bless people in our church and community with meals and small acts of love. In this month, God has brought a couple churches and people onto our team bringing us up to 75% funded with consistent monthly support.

Testimony of relationships and opening hearts

God has been opening the hearts of the people we have been connecting with at our local shops. We now have their phone numbers and are spending time with them outside of their work hours and have begun inviting them into our home. This past week I spent time with one of the girls and as we begun to talk about faith she shared that she is open to faith in general and it is something she enjoys learning about. I am eager to continue this conversation with her. Inviting people into your home in Japan is something very rare, but I believe God is touching lives by bringing the Japanese people into family.

Testimony of salvation

Towards the beginning of the month I was able to spend the day connecting with another missionary couple who have started a house church about 45min north of us. They are seeing many come to know Christ through a garage cafe they do and hosting dinner parties in their home for anyone to have a free meal, spend time in community, and encounter Jesus. It was really inspiring and I was able to pray and minister to some of the new believers in their church including one young man who was saved on Jan 1 this year after attending one of their dinner parties!

Testimony of dreams and joy being renewed

God has been renewing our families joy and hope for what’s next. While their has been so much transition and things happening in the world, our home has become a place of great peace and where dreams are being birthed. We have had breakthrough with Liam and his speech and emotions since being here as well, and it’s very encouraging to see the progress he is making.

Testimony of God renewing and touching His people

Friday nights we have a prayer service at the church that we lead. We are seeing many encouraged, refreshed, and equipped. It’s an honor to walk alongside the Holy Spirit as He pours Himself out to His people.

I pray that you are encouraged. That the glimmer of hope you needed will continue to be breathed on and become a flame for all to see in the darkness. The next few weeks will be a bit busy with Aaron’s 33rd birthday and Liam’s 4th birthday coming up. Along with that we will be submitting applications for our kids to attend half days at a public nursery school and helping our friends move into a home. Please pray they accept our applications and the kids find a great school for April, our team finds the best home and have a peaceful transition, for the last 25% of monthly support to come in, and of course that God continue’s touching people we meet. We love you and are incredibly thankful to have you apart of this journey. Here are some photos of this past month including some of those mentioned in the above testimonies. With love,

- The McKisic’s

Happy Holidays from Japan

sar.mckisic@gmail.com (Sarah McKisic) — Mon, 07 Jun 2021 08:11:24 GMT

Friends and Family,

I can hardly believe I am writing this email to say Merry Christmas and Happy New Year… where did the time go?! What a year it has been. I hope you all had a Christmas full of joy, hope, and the presence of God. This was our first Christmas in Japan and although it looked very different then years past we feel so thankful we had the opportunity to spend it with one another and our dear friends. Our team arrived safely in Tokyo this month and just in time for Christmas together. We also had the joy of bringing our new friends at the local shop here some pastries for their work shift on Christmas. They are people we are quickly becoming close with and they are opening up to us. Please be praying for our relationships and for Jesus to move with love through us. Loving on our neighbours has and will continue to be one of our highest priorities. We have found that the simplest gestures like remembering their names, asking how they are, and pushing past the barrier here that screams, “you are just a worker serving me”, is making impact. Culture would say it is weird to speak to those taking our orders or cashing us out, but Kingdom says you are worthy of love and being spoken too, so we will do that. Relationship takes time and we are steadily building. It has been so fun to see them begin to share their lives with us and invite us in. Towards the beginning of building a few approached us thanking us for remembering their names and being so kind. One the other day said to me, “Not gaijin, Sarah san.” Sounds simple, but it meant a lot. All that to say, relationships and language are coming along. In the last two months we have hosted some families for dinner from the church, met some incredible missionaries we hope to continue connecting with, and begun Friday Night prayer services at the church. This week we have the opportunity to go out just Aaron and I to process this past year and dream for the next. One thing I know is I am grateful you are here and apart of this journey with us. My prayer in this next year is that you and the Japanese all feel Immanuel, God with Us. Bless you and your final days of 2020 and beginning days of 2021.

With love,

- The McKisics

October, the Warm Welcome

sar.mckisic@gmail.com (Sarah McKisic) — Mon, 07 Jun 2021 08:06:20 GMT

It's hard to believe we are wrapping up one month here in Japan. While two weeks in quarantine felt like forever, these past two weeks settling into our new home in Hiroo, Tokyo went by in the blink of an eye. The

last couple of weeks we were met with the warmest welcomes in the community and church. Many meals, surprise birthday cakes, and coffee dates were had with those in the congregation. Some people have offered to meet with us to connect and help us study Japanese so we have begun setting aside time for that. Hours upon hours have been spent setting up our home and life with the kids. Seven moves and one being oversees brings new emotions and concepts our kids have never experienced. They love it here and have been given many gifts and love, but still have a lot to process for being so little. They've had their fair share of meltdowns and confusion on why they can't go see their friends or family. As much as we'd love to jump full-on into ministry, we realize that a big portion of the ministry is at home with our family, doing what feels mundane at times and bringing consistency and love in. With the start of our third week in Tokyo, we are still setting up legal and practical things like health insurance, bank accounts, school enrollment, and phones. Here in Japan, being a foreigner isn't easy and almost every little task becomes a big one with hoops to jump through at every turn. We hope to begin new rhythms for our family to thrive while completing the needed tasks one step at a time. If all goes well we will be finished by the end of this week or next. Our days are a mix of God time, tasks, family time, connecting and serving the church, studying the language, and meeting workers/baristas in our area for ministry. We have a heart for hospitality and plan to begin hosting young families and neighbors in our home for meals in the coming weeks. In other good news, our teammates the Barbutti's have received what is needed to enter the country and arrive on December 22nd! We are incredibly excited to have them here and begin pioneering an Iris Base with them. They pioneered a base in Fortaleza Brazil and have a lot of wisdom in this area. Much of the first year together will be a slow and steady build of our families, team, and ministry. During this time we will be moving again to be near them, in a more suburb of Tokyo, to do life, build, and dream together. Along with this, we will be serving the church, 21st CCC, who hosted our visas and graciously helped us settle in! Being here for one month we can already see the gap in our finances and where God will need to provide. He has already provided so much and given us an incredible team! Tokyo is one of the more expensive mission fields and we are 61% funded. If you’d like to partner with us one time, monthly, or annually you can do so on our website. We believe being fully funded will maximize our fruitfulness in our ministry and family and keep us on the field for the long haul. You will also find new video updates on the journey page. Each video is broken up into parts due to the website's ability to load only small videos. We have also updated what we need prayer for on the support page and know how important your prayers are before God. Thank you for continuing to be here and supporting our family.

With love,

- The McKisic’s

REDEMPTION AND NEW DREAMS

sar.mckisic@gmail.com (Sarah McKisic) — Mon, 08 Feb 2021 07:15:12 GMT

Here's a little corner of our home, a space we have begun creating for our kids to learn and play. A space for them to learn about Jesus, life skills, and practical things for when they begin school. This corner inspires me, even though it's just the beginning, because it reminds me of the process that got us here. The process that brought us to Japan and to teaching our kids in an intentional space in our home. After having my second, I went through a season of postpartum anxiety that felt like it lasted forever. Many days I called Aaron begging him to come home and help with the simplest of tasks because everything felt like a challenge. The sounds of crying, the night wakings, the endless site of dishes and laundry, it all felt too much. It made me so overwhelmed that I thought I was going crazy. After 8 months or so, I started taking medication. Something I encouraged many others to do and cheered them on for their bravery for it. Yet for myself, I could probably be doing more to take it away before needing to take that step, or it’s not that bad... I thought. But once I realized how much the anxiety was robbing from me being present, I decided it wasn’t worth not giving it a try. A week in, I was driving home and had the thought that I was happy and that the mountains looked beautiful today, and in that moment I also realized how foreign that thought had become. Don’t get me wrong, I still had many moments of happiness and felt God close but I also had moments of hard crashing. I must’ve internalized it pretty well because although I voiced the feelings, many didn’t realize how hard it was on me. A couple weeks in on the medication I was inspired to cook and do dishes, I wanted to hold my kids even when they were crying, and I felt present. I was able to use that momentum to implement healthy eating & routines to get off of the medication three months later, but it was absolutely the support I needed to get there. There were some beautiful things that came from that season but also many lies I had to unravel and give to God. It was that season that I woke up, realized I wasn’t doing what I knew I was called to do, where I was called to be. It pushed Aaron and I closer together and unified us towards a common goal, and help us lean into one another for strength. I gave up my way of doing things and allowed others in to help. But I also began to believe that I wasn’t cut out to be a mom of many kids, I wasn’t cut out to homeschool or create intentional spaces for my kids because it would probably be too much for me and my personality type. I began to believe that any more children would push me into a point of brokenness that can’t be redeemed, that the endless lack of sleep and crying would be more then I could bare. I have told anyone and everyone that I for sure would never have more kids. But you know what?! God has so redeemed that. He’s traded my lies for truth and shown me the grace he has for mother’s, for me. He’s shown me my potential, walked me into believing again in myself, given me a chance to dream again, and walked me into a point of inspiration and beauty. So here we are, where we were called and meant to be, dreaming about what’s next, and creating intentional space in our home for our kids to thrive. Still unlearning and relearning, still pushing myself to go for the hard things and telling myself I have the capacity and grace for it. It may be hard, I may need to change things along the road, but there’s always grace. Cheers to presence over perfection and the God who redeems. Cheers to maybe having more babies, maybe adopting, maybe homeschooling... whatever it may be. Cheers to doing some hard things of all kinds with Jesus and creating space for our family to learn and thrive. It'll be a process, it’ll be messy, it’ll be good.

ONE MONTH IN THE BOOKS

sar.mckisic@gmail.com (Sarah McKisic) — Wed, 18 Nov 2020 05:09:49 GMT

It's hard to believe we are wrapping up one month here in Japan. While two weeks in quarantine felt like forever, these past two weeks settling into our new home in Hiroo, Tokyo went by in the blink of an eye. The last couple of weeks we were met with the warmest welcomes in the community and church. Many meals, surprise birthday cakes, and coffee dates were had with those in the congregation. Some people have offered to meet with us to connect and help us study Japanese so we have begun setting aside time for that. Hours upon hours have been spent setting up our home and life with the kids. Seven moves and one being oversees brings new emotions and concepts our kids have never experienced. They love it here and have been given many gifts and love, but still have a lot to process for being so little. They've had their fair share of meltdowns and confusion on why they can't go see their friends or family. As much as we'd love to jump full-on into ministry, we realize that a big portion of the ministry is at home with our family, doing what feels mundane at times and bringing consistency and love in. With the start of our third week in Tokyo, we are still setting up legal and practical things like health insurance, bank accounts, school enrollment, and phones. Here in Japan, being a foreigner isn't easy and almost every little task becomes a big one with hoops to jump through at every turn. We hope to begin new rhythms for our family to thrive while completing the needed tasks one step at a time. If all goes well we will be finished by the end of this week or next. Our days are a mix of God time, tasks, family time, connecting and serving the church, studying the language, and meeting workers/baristas in our area for ministry. We have a heart for hospitality and plan to begin hosting young families and neighbors in our home for meals in the coming weeks. In other good news, our teammates the Barbutti's have received what is needed to enter the country and arrive on December 22nd! We are incredibly excited to have them here and begin pioneering an Iris Base with them. They pioneered a base in Fortaleza Brazil and have a lot of wisdom in this area. Much of the first year together will be a slow and steady build of our families, team, and ministry. During this time we will be moving again to be near them, in a more suburb of Tokyo, to do life, build, and dream together. Along with this, we will be serving the church, 21st CCC, who hosted our visas and graciously helped us settle in! Being here for one month we can already see the gap in our finances and where God will need to provide. He has already provided so much and given us an incredible team! Tokyo is one of the more expensive mission fields and we are 61% funded. We believe being fully funded will maximize our fruitfulness in our ministry and family and keep us on the field for the long haul. If you’d like to partner with us one time, monthly, or annually you can do so on the support tab above. You will also find new video updates on the journey page. Each video is broken up into parts due to the website's ability to load only small videos. We have also updated what we need prayer for and know how important your prayers are before God. Thank you for continuing to be here and supporting our family.
With love,

- The McKisic’s

THE COMPASSIONATE SAVIOR

Fri, 11 Sep 2020 21:57:39 GMT

It's been a while since I've written a blog post, but I wanted to share about what I've been learning lately. It's been about two and a half months since we left California, lots of transition and four homes later, I'm learning about Jesus, the compassionate savior. As I've been reading through the bible this year verse after verse we see His compassion and His heart for the needy and broken. Matthew 9:36 - “Seeing the people, He felt compassion for them, because they were distressed and dispirited like sheep without a shepherd.” ; Matthew 14:14 - “When He went ashore, He saw a large crowd, and felt compassion for them and healed their sick.” ; Matthew 20:34 - “Moved with compassion , Jesus touched their eyes; and immediately they regained their sight and followed Him.” As you can see He felt compassion over and over again and it moved Him to do something. Compassion moved Him to heal the sick, dine with and call the sinners, and most importantly die the most gruesome death in history for the sins of you and I. We live in a culture that praises the wealthy and well put together people but Jesus sat and dined with sinners, he cleansed the leapers who everyone dared not touch, and He washed the dirty feet of his disciples. He was never afraid or judging of the messy, hurting, worn out people. Mark 2:17 says, "On hearing this, Jesus said to them, "It is not the healthy who need a doctor, but the sick. I have not come to call the righteous, but sinners." He came FOR THE SINNERS. He was moved with compassion FOR THE SINNERS. When I read the scriptures and see Him move with compassion for the broken, needy, least of these I can't help but notice the gap in my own life, the gap in our culture, and the gap in the church. God has been deepening my desire to be a woman who is moved with compassion. I don't want to get so caught up in the busyness of life that I miss the very thing Jesus set out to do. I don't want to miss the person on the side of the road, or the one next to me in a coffee shop, or in the seat next to me at church - the one God wants to touch with His compassionate love. A couple of weeks ago I sat at a coffee shop and was telling God that I want to be a fool for Him if it means others experience His love the way I have. A few minutes later I felt compelled to pray for the woman across from me. Jesus was moved with compassion for her sick son and unsaved children and after feeling God's intense desire for her to know that He is with her in it, I couldn't say no. I couldn't cave to fear of man or failure, I couldn't be what stops the compassionate savior from making His love known to her. "Sarah, I want her. I want her. I want her," He said. Who am I to not let Him be known? Who am I to stop the God of compassion from moving? Nothing but a mere vessel who is to be used to display the compassion of God. I will probably never forget the intensity of His desire for her and really the desire He has for you and I. These are moments I want more of for the both of us. Moments of feeling that life changing love He has for those we are surrounded by day in and day out. Moments of experiencing the life changing love He has for you and I. A few years ago I had a similar encounter where a Japanese woman sat in front of me with her husband asking for prayer for her cancer. I immediately saw Jesus sitting at her feet weeping with compassion, weeping for the pain she was experiencing. Overwhelmed I began to weep at her feet and pray for the God of healing to come touch her, for the God of compassion to do what He does best. As time has passed, I have become a weeper. I weep for the unsaved souls of Japan (99% DO NOT KNOW my compassionate savior... 99%!!), I weep for more of God, I weep... and I pray that God continues to deepen my heart for compassion. I pray that as you read this that the God of compassion shows up and meets you in every messy, broken, hurting corner of your heart and life. I see Jesus weeping with you. He hasn't passed you by. I pray that the warmth and love of Jesus fills in all the gaps and wraps you up close. I pray that Jesus becomes so very real and that your life would be changed as you just sit and weep with Him. I pray that God deepens your heart for compassion and compels you to follow Him no matter the costs. Isaiah 42:3 says, "A bruised reed he will not break, and a smoldering wick he will not snuff out. In faithfulness he will bring forth justice." He has come for you and those around you who feel bruised or barley lit. Nothing is too far broken or a smoldering wick. With gentleness He will bring forth healing and life. Praying for you today. May you and I know this compassionate savior Jesus in all His fullness and glory.

KINGDOM MATH

Fri, 22 May 2020 03:46:09 GMT

"Abraham named that place God-Yireh (God-Sees-to-It). That’s where we get the saying, 'On the mountain of God, he sees to it.'” - Genesis 22:14

As I was spending time with God this morning I was reminded of a phrase that my old boss use to say. “Put the people where the people are.” After God reminder me of this, He began to show me the people He is sending us to in Japan. Did you know that Tokyo is the most populated city in the world with 8,336,599 people within 845 mi². It’s the home of the next summer Olympics where they’re expecting more then half a million people to attend the event daily for two weeks. It is quite literally “where the people are”. Japan has a population of 126,520,036 with less then 1% claiming to know Jesus. It is within the 10/40 window where less then 10% of global missionaries are reaching. It currently is called “a missionary’s graveyard.” Japan is by definition one of the largest unreached people groups in the world. The next question you may be asking is, “well that’s awesome you’re going where the people are but how will your small team reach that many people?” That was mine and we have dreams, ideas, plans. But God without hesitation showed me in the Bible where time and time again that within His timing and His plan, He showed up as the God of multiplication. From multiplying food, to defeating large armies with His small ones (including breathing life into an army of dry bones!), and making a nation out of Abraham who miraculously bore a son in his old age. My God is a God of multiplication, a God who breathes life into graveyards. He is who Abraham called “God-Yireh” meaning God sees to it. From a place of obedience and offering, God sees to it, God multiplies, God provides. I believe without a doubt that God has called our family and team to go and He will see to it. He will open eyes, hearts and minds. A place where the people are, He will also be. He can do a lot with little. As we begin to step out we are believing God for more encounters, salvation's in Japan, financial provision to go and remain with the people, and a covering of prayer and community. He will see to it.

I also want to take the opportunity to invite you in on this journey of seeing God show up in these ways. You may not be physically joining us but with support through prayer and finances you are apart of what God is doing. If you want to partner with us in prayer you can do so on our website and sign up to be on our team! Financially if you feel led to sow into us and partner with our vision, we are looking for 100 people to give $30 a month. No matter how much you can give whether that is a one time gift of $5 or $30 a month, whatever it may be I believe God is going to bring multiplication to it for our moving and living costs and to you and your finances. You can find a place to sign up to pray on the vision page or give financially on our support page ! Thanks for supporting us. We love you all and are so excited to have you here and on our team.

This photo was taken by me back in 2016 while scouting the land in Tokyo to see where we would want to live!! This here is Shibuya Crossing, the world’s busiest pedestrian crossing, with as many as 2,500 people crossing at a time!

Wave Breakers

sar.mckisic@gmail.com (Sarah McKisic) — Sun, 17 May 2020 23:41:22 GMT

"God is King, robed and ruling, God is robed and surging with strength. And yes, the world is firm, immovable, Your throne ever firm—you’re Eternal! Sea storms are up, God, Sea storms wild and roaring, Sea storms with thunderous breakers. Stronger than wild sea storms, Mightier than sea-storm breakers, Mighty God rules from High Heaven. What you say goes—it always has. “Beauty” and “Holy” mark your palace rule, God, to the very end of time." - Psalms 93 MSG

It's April 11th, 2020. My daughter's 1st birthday. It feels very necessary to ponder upon this past year, a year so full of overwhelming anxiety, breakthroughs, the closeness of God, dreams fulfilled, and new depths of trust and faith. This is a more vulnerable post but one of hope I wanted to share nonetheless. Ella's first year of life was one of the hardest years of mine and on the other hand it was the best year I've had yet. A few weeks after Ella entered my world, I noticed the sadness and anxiety wasn't letting up. After reaching out to friends and family for prayer, encouragement, and wisdom I decided to start counseling. I began pursuing everything you can think of when it comes to ‘holistic’ heath and establishing routines that I felt “should” take this away. Months went on and nothing was really changing. Many sleepless nights and many tears shed by Ella… and me. This led me to research more about postpartum depression and anxiety, could I really have it? Could this be something that to overcome will need more than just doing all the “right” things - diet, exercise, vitamins, prayer, processing? “Surely not,” is what I thought. “Maybe I just need to keep trying, maybe this isn't as bad as I think, others probably have it worse…” the thoughts continued. There was always a lingering idea that I could be doing more and obviously, someone else had it worse than me. The anxiety worsened and felt debilitating. My brain felt so overwhelmed by every simple task. Things I once enjoyed like texting back loved ones or caring for my children, all felt really hard. Tasks that I once felt good at became things that swirled me into a state of hopelessness. Ella felt like such a mystery that I couldn't figure out. It was defeating because as a mom I felt like I “should” just know what she needs, how to get her to sleep and stay asleep, and meet every demand and desire. There’s that should thought again. I began to shut down more and more and leave Aaron to care for the kids while I sat in my room alone wishing I could disappear and have complete silence. Ella’s cries felt deafening and I felt completely stuck. The nights with Ella hardly sleeping felt long and like they bled into long days. Aaron was working and I felt stuck trying to care for a baby I didn’t have figured out and a toddler who still didn’t have words to communicate needs or emotions. Around 8 months in I remember reading a post of someone else walking through postpartum anxiety and depression, in the comments someone responded, “I have had PPD for a while but felt ashamed to take medication. It has felt like it’s taken me a long time to come to terms with all the time I missed out on.” This was pretty eye-opening for me as I began to ponder upon what I felt like I was missing out in the season by staying where I was. It was around this time that I was so frustrated and exhausted at the end of the day and rubbing my face and shutting down and I looked over and saw Liam begin to imitate me. I knew something needed to change and I needed more help then what I or my husband could give. I got on medication and within days felt like myself again. Driving home from running an errand I had thoughts about how beautiful everything was and how happy I was and it dawned on me how unfamiliar those thoughts had been. We began to make progress with Ella’s sleep training and getting more sleep at night and taking steps towards a more peaceful and joyful present. I was able to start doing normal activities and take care of the kids with more patience. It felt like a night and day difference. With the change in my state of mind, I was able to establish healthy rhythms and routines to help me and my family thrive. At the beginning of March of 2020, two and a half months into taking my medication, Aaron stopped working as we felt God leading us into full-time missions. With him being home, having a larger support system, and new rhythms that helped me, I began to wean off my medication. By the end of the month, I was completely done and felt amazing! I wanted to share this all so it will bring you to hope for whatever hard season you may be facing and also break the negative stigma associated with depression medication. There is no shame if you need medication to balance your hormones and help you get your life back. Your value and worth are rooted completely in a God who says you are worthy. He desires to be connected to you. He went beyond just saying this, He sent His son to die on the cross to say YOU ARE VALUABLE, and your brokenness, medication, and pain don’t trump that. Amid those first 8 months, I was unsure if I’d get back to being me, back to thriving, and past the shadow I felt under. I would hear the Lord say in response, “Lean into the breaking. You will be okay. I won’t let you fall.” It reminds me of the verse I started off with. Psalms 93 the MSG, "God is King, robed and ruling, God is robed and surging with strength. And yes, the world is firm, immovable, Your throne ever firm—you’re Eternal! Sea storms are up, God, Sea storms wild and roaring, Sea storms with thunderous breakers. Stronger than wild sea storms, Mightier than sea-storm breakers, Mighty God rules from High Heaven. What you say goes—it always has. “Beauty” and “Holy” mark your palace rule, God, to the very end of time." Now that I am beyond it I can say I most certainly have not been broken by the mighty sea storm breakers but rather have been made firm and full of strength. I am now grateful for that season of suffering and pain. It was a season of much pressure but I feel more refined and closer to God. He was so present and near, encouraging and comforting, and filling in all the gaps. There was a thought that I may look back on the season with regret or make decisions moving forward out of brokenness from it, but it’s the opposite. I look back seeing what God brought me through knowing with Him there’s nothing I can’t overcome. This is also for you. Where you are now, isn’t the end. What you feel now, isn’t how you will always feel. He has more for you and He will see you through this season and the many others ahead. He is in every valley and on every mountain top, and He will be near through them all. There is comfort from the comforter awaiting you and healing from the healer. There is more hope, more love, and more presence ahead. And I pray that in every hard season, in every suffering, and in all the pain, past, present, and future that you will feel Him, lean in, and be renewed by Him. I pray that as God, mighty, firm, and un-moveable, would take up his rightful place on the throne in your heart and mind and everything would be brought to peace and hope.

*Started this post April 11 and finished it today May 17. It was a full month but I still wanted to share this journey with you all.

APRIL RECAP

sar.mckisic@gmail.com (Sarah McKisic) — Thu, 14 May 2020 22:18:13 GMT

Happy May! We have been meaning to send out an April recap for a while now but you see that cutie above who loves punching keyboards... she kind of makes sitting at a computer for more than five minutes hard, add her three-year-old brother to the mix who decided naps are no longer essential and now writing to you all takes a miracle. Yet here we are, a miracle taking place, a few days late but here nonetheless. We are finally ready to see how you are doing after this past month of quarantine and to let you in on some exciting things that have been unfolding in our world. First things first, we are so glad you are here and following along on this journey and would love to hear how you are doing! You are so very important to us and we would love to hear from you! So please, reply to this email so we can hear how you are holding up, what questions you have about our journey, and what you need prayer for! For us, April was a big month amidst social-distancing. We've "tried" balancing times of rest and connection with each other, times of learning the Japanese language and bible, and times of tasks for our move. I'd give ourselves an A in the connect category, Aaron an A+ in learning, and myself an A+ in tasks! All in all, we couldn't each ace every category but together as a team, we did pretty well. Let's just say May holds a lot of learning for me and I can't wait to dive in. In April, we sold everything we own except for a few books and our Jeep, but if all goes well that may be sold by the end of the week! In this entire process, our goal has been to make space for God. This has led us to make decisions that to others doesn't make sense. We have decided from the start that we are all in and willing to be radical in following God despite what it may look like. Aaron stopped working in March and we began support raising for full-time missions. In April with no specific move date in sight, we still sold everything so we can be fluid and move when God moves. The more and more we let go the more anticipation we are filled with knowing God has room to show up and will. And so far He has! In April we got an invitation from our dear friends Herbert and Lorelei Barbutti to be apart of Iris Global to start a base in Tokyo. To have this family to run and pursue God with and the covering of Iris Global is an answer to prayer. We are now officially Iris Global missionaries and raising support through their website. Our original idea of being in Japan by June is still on the table but it could be sometime in July as well. We fully trust God to open the way in His timing and will be doing what we can in the meantime to prepare. Paperwork is beginning to be processed and we are praying that by the time we receive our Certificate of Eligibility from Japan that the consolute in San Francisco will be open again to give us visas. Because of everyone's generosity and selling our belongings, In April we went from 17% to 90% for our moving costs goal last month! We continued support raising for our living costs once in Japan which has been quite the learning curve and led us to a place of greater surrender and faith. If I were to say one thing I have learned this month it is that God is faithful and near in the minute details of our lives, the big transitions, and the unprecedented times. I pray that as we share with you all that God is doing and saying that you will be encouraged and full of radical faith. I believe that as you begin to make space for God, He will come and fill it all to overflow. Blessings and love,

- The McKisic Family

THE PUZZLE

Mon, 10 Feb 2020 22:59:06 GMT

Psalms 37:4 “Take delight in the LORD, and he will give you the desires of your heart.”

It’s 11am on a brisk sunny day. Once again a miracle is taking place as I write and sip a hot coffee. We are a little over six months in as parents of two and just starting to settle into some kind of normal. The kids are beginning to take mid day naps together in their room and giving me some time to share my thoughts with you all. Generally during this time I tuck in for sleep, but having this opportunity to put my words on “paper” feels really good. *Disclaimer I started writing this when Ella was 6 months old… she will be 10 months in a few days. Only took me 4 months to finish (haha!!)*

The last eight years have felt like a puzzle. Aaron and I had a fuzzy idea of what the finished pieces would look like but not enough clarity to get it finished quickly and with ease. Many times we would find the Japan piece and try to fit it in and it wasn't lining up quite the way we were hoping it would. One of these moments was right before we got married. We built out a website, set up a place to receive money instead of wedding gifts to help with moving cost, and shared with our pre-marriage counselor from our church that we would be moving to Japan immediately after getting married. We planned a small wedding with just our immediate family, only 11 adults and 6 kids in attendance, and decided this would be our “see ya laters”. This obviously didn’t unfold the way we hoped due to finances and logistics. Later that year we decided Aaron would go back to school with hopes of getting a degree that would help us have favor and open doors in Japan (he was majoring in economics with a minor in math and Japanese.) We enjoyed our first anniversary in Tokyo in 2016 and used that trip as a time to “scout out the land” for where we would want to live once he graduated. On this trip Aaron had the incredible opportunity to attend a leadership summit where business leaders, many representing embassies in foreign countries and the prime minister spoke. That was also the same year we began growing our family so we settled into Ohio with still dreams of being in Japan one day. In February of 2017 the first of our tribe came into the world, Liam Archer. In December of 2017, Aaron completed his degree and began applying for jobs which took us to Redding, CA. In 2018 not too long after the move we got pregnant with our girl Ella. In March 2019, at Ella’s baby shower, we had a friend prophesy that Ella would be the missing piece to our puzzle and things would begin to fall into place with her arrival. About a month before her due date, Aaron and I had a Skype session where we talked about how the dreams we once had seemed like they were not unfolding. In the place where we once held promise we now held disappointment. We dreamed of raising our family in Japan and doing ministry together along with other things. This conversation altered so much for us. A couple days later I felt the Holy Spirit so strongly enter the bathroom where I was getting ready for a friends baby shower and I felt an invitation to say yes to our dreams and to live a life of intentionally co-laboring with Him to see them come about. I laid there on my bathroom floor, recommitting my yes to Him and to the dreams He placed in Aaron and Is hearts. It felt as if I came out of a state of “sleep walking” if you will. This changed the way we spoke; to one another, in regards to our dreams and to the Lord. Not only did intentionality come back that day but so did faith. April came and along with it also came, our missing puzzle piece, Ella Daisy. During one of our family walks in the gardens two months later we were once again dreaming with each other and Jesus. Right as we were discussing what trusting God looks like, a man walked past us singing over and over, “We will trust that He will lead us where we are suppose to go.” That same day our carbon alarm was going off. This typically happens every seven years but it had only been two. Our landlord decided to come over and take a look at it and see if it needed replaced. While he was over he asked what our next steps are and we decided to share with him about the yes we just gave God regarding Japan. He then told us his co-worker was taking a trip to Japan in the next month and wanted to connect us to see what God would do. This led to dinner with a lady from a church in Tokyo, Japan. The exact same church Aaron led a missions trip team to back in 2014. Also the same church he said in 2016 while in Tokyo with me, “How amazing would it be if we lived here and could be apart of 21st Century Church.” Little did we know what connections God would bring about to make this a reality. Since we gave our yes their have been many other connections and relationships formed with likeminded people who are going to Japan and just got over there. It’s been incredible to watch ourselves and others catch the heart beat of God and lay everything down for it. Other people have messaged me telling me about dreams they’ve had of us in Japan. One dream we were sitting at a table speaking fluent Japanese and having breakfast with a family we met In Osaka in 2013. Aaron’s coworker had a dream that I would have a ministry similar to Havilah Cunnington called ‘Truth to Table’. That I would bring truth and minister to women and moms. In the dream I had a ministry of fertility and was using it in Japan. What she didn’t know was that one of Japan’s current issues is a low birth rate and their population is declining, leading to many other issues. In December, a friend sent me a prophetic word about God bringing clarity and handing out blueprints for what we are to steward in 2020. It was only a few weeks later and a couple days into 2020 when we were offered visas through 21st Century Church! We are now officially beginning our visa paperwork process with the goal of moving our family THIS YEAR!

The peace and ability to rest amidst such big change lying ahead feels like such a gift from God. If I were to sum up what this journey has been, in one word, it’d be - trust. I once heard Bill Johnson say, “Bold faith stands on the shoulders of quiet trust.” It took me many years to fully understand what that meant. As we spend time and rest in the quiet places with God, learn His voice and His ways, we are moved with bold faith in the public. Everything is an overflow of our heart and mind. The last eight years have been me and the Lord shedding off levels of control and lies I held and moving into deeper love and trust for Him, myself and others. This all took place in what could be considered the mundane things and times. God doesn't and didn’t wait for a Sunday to move and make me more like Him. In the past year I have stepped into a new level of confidence and faith in Him. It was and still is in the waiting where we get to let go and just be. Be with Him and Be ourselves and feel fullness of Joy! I can truly say I feel that. We haven't “arrived” and we still don't know the ins and outs of when or how BUT we know that God is close, moving on our behalf and in all the details. He is incredibly good - past, present and future. I want to encourage those in seasons of waiting and unknowing.. lean in and learn His voice and feel His love. Everything you need and desire can be had right here.. in this moment.. in this place.. in these things you are doing. His promises over your life are GOOD and He desires to give you good things and do good things through you. Give Him your "YES" and watch what He does.

TIMING, TRIPS & TRUSTING

sar.mckisic@gmail.com (Sarah McKisic) — Sun, 09 Feb 2020 23:31:56 GMT

ROMANS 8:12-15 "So don’t you see that we don’t owe this old do-it-yourself life one red cent. There’s nothing in it for us, nothing at all. The best thing to do is give it a decent burial and get on with your new life. God’s Spirit beckons. There are things to do and places to go! This resurrection life you received from God is not a timid, grave-tending life. It’s adventurously expectant, greeting God with a childlike “What’s next, Papa?”

2010 Aaron's 1st trip to Osaka, Japan

He doesn't have any photos from this trip, living in the moment!

2012 Aaron and Sarah Meet

This is the year I took my first trip to Cameroon, Africa. At the time I felt very called to missions but wasn't sure where to yet. I saw many great things. After meeting Aaron, the passion he had for Japan and the people oozed from him and I had to know why. This lead me to sign up for my first trip to Japan!

2013 Aaron's 2nd trip to Osaka, Gamagori, Nagoya & Shizuoka

2013 Sarah's 1st trip to Osaka and Okinawa

This was a life changing trip for me. I felt the joy and heart of the father for the Japanese people and have never questioned my call to love on and serve them since. I still tear up looking over the many, many... many photos I took. God moved in joy, freedom and healing.

2014 Aaron's 3rd trip to Osaka, Shizuoka & Tokyo

Aaron once again has only photos of the buildings from this trip, where he lead a Bethel team, but fortunately I found photos students with him took while on the trip! They did ministry in churches, an orphanage & on the streets.

2015 Aaron & Sarah get Married 5.15.15

Leading up to our marriage we dreamed of the idea to immediately move after the wedding ceremony to do full time missions. We planned a small wedding with only parents, siblings, nieces & nephews (17 total in attendance!) and decided to use the money we would've spent on a bigger ceremony on the move. This obviously didn't pan out so we continued to pray and dream.

2016 Aaron & Sarah's trip to Tokyo, Japan for 1st wedding Anniversary

This trip was our first trip not going for ministry and to 'scout out to land' to see where we would want to live! It was a time of connecting and dreaming. Aaron was in college for economics, math & Japanese. While in Tokyo he got to attend a leadership summit where the prime minister and business leaders spoke. It was a incredible opportunity! Shortly after this trip we found out little Liam was in my belly and decided to wait to move so Aaron could finish school and I have Liam in the US.

2017 Liam joins the Family 2.1.17

2018 Aaron graduates college & we move back to Redding, CA

2019 Aaron & Sarah give their 'YES' and things begin to unfold

Sometime around March we came to the realization that we felt called to Japan but hadn't yet given God our full yes. I had a moment back in 2013 where I felt the Lord say, "As soon as you give me your full yes, It will be fast and I will go before you." After marriage I felt like I was suppose to let Aaron lead our family and let God speak to our hearts about what He has for us. Every year Japan would get brought back to the table but Aaron felt it would be wisdom to do other things like save money, get a degree and position ourselves under a church covering that we could be sent from. All with good intentions but not realizing that year after year "wisdom" would add another thing to the list that needed to be done before we could do the call. Long story short in the beginning of 2019 we both had moments of repentance before God for putting off what we have felt for so long called too and gave him our "YES". We were on a walk talking about what trusting God in this process would look like and a man walked by at that exact moment singing over and over, "We will trust God that He will lead us where we are supposed to go." Later that day we were speaking with our land lord and he connected us with his co-worker who then connected us with a church named 21st Century in Tokyo, Japan. (A church Aaron actually led a mission team to back in 2014 and the same exact church Aaron spoke of during our trip to Tokyo in 2016 saying, "Wouldn't it be so cool to live here and be apart of 21st Century Church.") We had dinner with one lady from the church while she was on a visit here in Redding and the rest is history. Connections after connections have been forming since with the details unfolding while we stay in a place of complete trust and peace in God.

2019 Ella joins the Party 4.11.19

2020 THE MCKISIC'S ARE MOVING TO JAPAN

A few days into 2020, 21st Century Church offered to sponsor us for visas so we can come serve their church and do full time missions in Japan. We are beginning the visa process and plan to move this year! We feel so much peace and see God moving in the details and timing. He is endlessly good and so worthy of our YES.

THE INVITATION

Tue, 14 Jan 2020 21:40:42 GMT

Let me tell you a little about my best friend.

You may of heard Him before… quietly speaking and guiding. You may of seen Him, in your child, spouse or friend. You may of felt Him, in the wind, the song or stillness. He is a friend that is always speaking, moving and reaching out. Maybe it’s been a while. Maybe your heart is longing for just one more whisper, glimpse or touch. My friend is one of great kindness. His tone is soft and soothing, much like a balm for a dry soul. His words bring refreshing and He always draws close to the weary. Much like spring water, He is flowing and purifying. His name is Jesus and He’s come for YOU. He is personal and not afraid of your messy humanity. Cleaning the feet of sinners and sharing a meal with them is how He spent his time, and still is. You may feel weary. hopeless. too dirty. shameful. unwanted. disappointed. BUT my friend, my absolute best friend, sees YOU and wants YOU. He doesn't make himself hard to access or withhold himself from you. He’s eagerly awaiting your knock. Psalm 9:9-10 (the MSG) says, “God’s a safe house for the battered, a sanctuary during bad times. The moment you arrive, you relax. you’re never sorry you knocked.” There’s an invitation right now for you to knock and to be filled. To hear, see and feel. It’s as simple as closing your eyes and saying, “Hi Jesus. I want to know you. What do you want to say to me?” and wait. He will respond. He desires to. Isaiah 40:31 (the MSG) says, “But those who wait upon God get fresh strength.They spread their wings and soar like eagles, They run and don’t get tired, they walk and don’t lag behind.” I pray that as you read this, your strength is renewed and that you feel Him as a friend, coming in close and refreshing your soul. I believe He is pulling out a chair for you to sit at His table. A table of abundance and no lack. A table He's been preparing for YOU.

A CALL TO THE CHURCH

Tue, 14 Jan 2020 21:35:05 GMT

“Church, it’s time to rise up so you can lie down.”

God very clearly keeps telling me this phrase. I truly believe it’s time for the church to rise and take its place of influence on this earth by getting low and serving ‘the least of these’. He want’s to build you up and instill in you your worth and authority so you can become a servant like Jesus. Jesus always got low. He wasn’t afraid of the dirty feet, he washed them and set an example for you and I to do the same. It was from a place of love and knowledge of His worth and identity that he set aside his robe and put on an apron. I believe that He wants to wash our feet so that we can become holy and be apart of what He is doing on this earth. Another phrase I keep hearing, “Spring water, spring water, spring water. Rise Up. Purify Me. Spring up out of me.” I see springs bursting forth and filling the earth with living pure water and the ground blooming with new life. A spring is a place where water naturally flows out of the ground which comes from the german word ‘springer’ meaning to leap from the ground. Spring water forms from aquifers which are underground water reservoirs. All aquifers are filled with water because they have a source feeding them. A spring forms when the pressure in the aquifers causes the water to flow out of the surface, normally at low elevations. I see the church getting low before the Lord and being fed with living water that fills us up so much so that the pressure increases and it in turn leaps out of us and onto the earth and those around us. We need to become so full of Him that the natural response is to have Him flow out. It all starts with getting low and connecting to the source. Once we are low we will naturally rise up and be in a position where we can wash feet. Following Jesus isn’t a promise to live a glamorous trouble free life but it is a promise for a blessed life. It’s time to rise so you can lie down. If you understand what He is saying, it’s time to ACT like it. Let us connect to Him, let him wash us clean and make us holy, and live out the example He has given us. Let’s wash feet. He is worthy.

John 13 (the MSG) -

“Just before the Passover Feast, Jesus knew that the time had come to leave this world to go to the Father. Having loved his dear companions, he continued to love them right to the end. It was suppertime. The Devil by now had Judas, son of Simon the Iscariot, firmly in his grip, all set for the betrayal. Jesus knew that the Father had put him in complete charge of everything, that he came from God and was on his way back to God. So he got up from the supper table, set aside his robe, and put on an apron. Then he poured water into a basin and began to wash the feet of the disciples, drying them with his apron. When he got to Simon Peter, Peter said, “Master, you wash my feet?” Jesus answered, “You don’t understand now what I’m doing, but it will be clear enough to you later.” Peter persisted, “You’re not going to wash my feet—ever!”

Jesus said, “If I don’t wash you, you can’t be part of what I’m doing.” “Master!” said Peter. “Not only my feet, then. Wash my hands! Wash my head!” Jesus said, “If you’ve had a bath in the morning, you only need your feet washed now and you’re clean from head to toe. My concern, you understand, is holiness, not hygiene. So now you’re clean. But not every one of you.” (He knew who was betraying him. That’s why he said, “Not every one of you.”) After he had finished washing their feet, he took his robe, put it back on, and went back to his place at the table. Then he said, “Do you understand what I have done to you? You address me as ‘Teacher’ and ‘Master,’ and rightly so. That is what I am. So if I, the Master and Teacher, washed your feet, you must now wash each other’s feet. I’ve laid down a pattern for you. What I’ve done, you do. I’m only pointing out the obvious. A servant is not ranked above his master; an employee doesn’t give orders to the employer. If you understand what I’m telling you, act like it—and live a blessed life.”

PEARLS AND PIGS

Mon, 13 Jan 2020 06:55:24 GMT

Do not give what is holy to the dogs; nor cast your pearls before swine, lest they trample them under their feet, and turn and tear you in pieces.

[New] King James, always the wordsmith! For whatever reason, I hear this middle portion of the verse all of the time. "Don't cast your pearls before swine", some well-to-do Christian would state, radiating with the holiness of Moses off the mountain. Even I would use it as an excuse for not giving when I believed a homeless person, for example, would instead use my charity for alcohol or drugs. Even writing that makes me feel gross. Gross or not, I felt validated thanks to this verse! I knew I was doing things right.

Then I read Luke 6:30.

Give to everyone who asks you, and if anyone takes what belongs to you, do not demand it back. (NIV)

Because I assumed Jesus, who is being quoted in Luke, had boundaries with giving, I didn't think much about this verse. However, in a recent effort to be a faux-theologian, I dive into just about every verse I read. Pausing to consider this verse and to see what others have stated about it, my mind was blown. To quote my favorite angle on this passage, the NIV Study Bible states, "Jesus again stresses that believers must be 'generous to a fault'". Generous to a fault?! Ridiculous.

Immediately, I thought about throwing all of those precious pearls before swine and how we are directly warned not to do it! Then it hit me. Jesus is not talking about money. He isn't even talking about pearls, or gold, or anything physical. He is talking about something holy. He is talking about the gospel. But if Jesus is talking about the gospel, then I can't use that verse as an excuse for Luke 6:30!

So, then what do we do with the whole, "give to everyone who asks"? Give! Give to the point where we look foolish. Do you know why? Because it doesn't matter! Money has no value in eternity (can you imagine how much inflation would devalue currency compounded to infinity?!). Not only that, when we do give these things that are worthless away, it becomes valuable. Jesus states himself that when we give to those in need we are giving to him! Now that is a win-win.

Ultimately, giving can often be an uncomfortable thing. We don't know what is going to happen in the transaction. We don't know what is going to happen with what is given. We believe that we would be more responsible with the money than those who receive it. Areas in our lives that are uncomfortable are opportunities for us to press in closer to Jesus and become holier ! So, give. Give the next time you are asked by a homeless man or stranger. Give when your spouse asks you to do something that they could easily have done themselves. Give when it feels uncomfortable. Give, simply because it is the only model Jesus ever gave.

BEHIND LOCKED DOORS

Thu, 14 Nov 2019 18:03:55 GMT

And Jesus grew in wisdom and stature, and in favor with God and man . Luke 2:52 has been one of the most perplexing verses in the bible for me. Maybe I am the only one, but whenever someone is talking about Jesus, I imagine Jesus, the adult. What I never think about is that Jesus wasn't born an adult. Sure, I know the story of the baby in the manger, but, then we fast forward to turning water into wine, and suddenly Jesus didn't have a childhood. I never think about how he had to learn how to walk, talk, and put on his robe. I never think about how he may have had growing pains, a cracking voice, or a stubby beard. But what blows my mind more than anything, is that Jesus grew in favor with God. This verse takes place before any miracle occurs or before any disciple follows him. At this point in scripture, Jesus was only 12 years old.

In verse 43, Jesus' parents forget him at a party. A whole day passes before they realize they left the savior of the universe behind! When they found Jesus, he was going toe to toe with the spiritual leaders and blowing the minds of those who were privileged to sit in on the conversation. As any reasonable parents would, Mary and Joseph ask why Jesus would do such a thing to them (which I find ridiculous. I don't know about the 12-year-olds in Jesus' day, but I wouldn't blame a 6th grader for being left behind. Just saying). Jesus' response, I would imagine, creates a pretty awkward moment. "Why were you searching for me? Didn't you know I had to be in my Father's house?"

In just two questions, Jesus makes it clear that he associates more with the heavenly Father than he does with his earthly parents. Not understanding what he is talking about, Jesus' parents take him home. Between being grounded and gaining favor, something happens. Jesus is obedient.

Jesus makes it clear that his place is in the temple, yet he submits to the authority of his parents. Even Jesus decided to delay what was his for the sake of holiness. By intentionally delaying what Jesus knew was his by being obedient, not lazy, he was able to gain something that he may arguably not have had he stayed at the temple. Though there may be many things that lead to a growing favor with the Father, let us consider that obedience be the first and foremost reason. Is it possible that there are things that we do in life that impact how God engages with us? Yes.

What an uncomfortable thought!

God's favor is what sets the stage for the miraculous and unbelievable to happen. God's favor is what distinguishes those who are obedient and those who are lax. God's favor gets us behind locked doors.

What does that even mean?! Have you ever found yourself in a room where you think, "Why was I invited to this meeting?" or, "At what point did I become their equal?". These questions aren't a lack of confidence but are simply a realization that a "leap" has taken place. Favor is to blame. It brings us into rooms, before people, and into situations that we never thought possible. But, unlike anointings, giftings, and callings, favor is not freely given, it is a response to obedience. But obedience to what? Proverbs 3:3 instructs to bind mercy and truth around your neck and to write them on your heart. By obeying this instruction, you will grow in favor and stature with God (and even men). It is that simple.

But it isn't that easy.

To hold to mercy and truth in every scenario requires something that God gives without restraint: grace. However, that does not undo everything that was just stated. Though favor is not freely given but is a response to a lifestyle, it is only by God's grace that we can even come close to that lifestyle. Grace empowers us to offer mercy and lean into truth. In doing so, we gain access to His favor. What a relief!

Favor costs much, and it is clear that the bible requires us to pay for this through mercy and truth. However, we only obtain mercy and truth through grace. Grace is a person, and his name is Jesus. It is only through Jesus that we find it possible to receive favor with God. It is only through locking eyes and arms with the King of kings that we find ourselves behind locked doors.

SUFFERING EMBRACED

Mon, 28 Oct 2019 02:31:32 GMT

Over the past weeks and months, God has been whispering to me that there is a special lesson that He wants to teach me. As a man who loves knowledge, I was excited and eager to learn. I pressed in. God answered, "suffering". I pressed again, assuming He misspoke and meant to say something closer to "blessing", "wisdom", or "favor". "Suffering". Welp, I have learned from Peter to not make the same mistake three times... so I kept it to two. For whatever reason, God has been teaching me suffering. And, to be honest, I am loving every minute of it.

Ironically, this has been a tremendously peaceful and beautiful season. When someone is suffering, we imagine pain, discomfort, stress, and agony. We imagine these compounding to infinity until we are either broken and defeated, or rescued and healed. It has not been that at all. Although that form of suffering exists in the world, I would argue that there is another type of suffering that should be acknowledged and, dare I say, embraced.

To be sure, physical suffering and isolation for the Gospel will bear fruit greater than we can ever imagine. It is impossible to even comprehend what it will feel like to cast our crowns received for martyrdom before the throne, let alone hearing Jesus thank us for baring such a burden. I differentiate what I am talking about from this suffering that is brought on by persecution and want to speak to how God has allowed a different type of suffering to grow in our lives to propel us to new heights of holiness on this earth.

Before I continue, I also want to point out that we simply cannot currently, or probably ever, comprehend the importance of becoming the holiest versions of ourselves before crossing into eternity (a term I think is weird, as eternity has already begun). It feels weird to think that there is a chance it can impact how we spend the rest of our days in His presence. I don't mean that what we do on earth (assuming we leave here pursuing the Lord) will have a negative impact in Heaven, but what if the holier we live now changes and creates a potentially better eternity than what is already prepared? Just food for thought.

In regards to holiness, I believe there are only two ways to increase. The first is the most obvious of all: spend as much time with Father God as possible. The second: attend a lot of funerals.

Before you believe me to be a crazy person, let me clarify that I do not mean literal funerals. I am talking about personal funerals (pride, desire, habits, expectations) that vary in nature and size. Dietrich Bonhoeffer said it best, "When Christ calls a man, He bids him come and die." Said differently, when Jesus asks you to follow Him, He is expecting that something will be let go and/or die. But what is dying, and to what end? When Jesus calls us, the first thing that should die is whatever is holding us back from fully responding as His disciple. Any barrier to discipleship is Heaven's "public enemy number one". Once the barrier is buried, a process begins that accumulates to holiness on earth only attained through one thing that a lot of us find uncomfortable: suffering.

Every time we embrace suffering, something inside of us dies. This death and funeral is a response created only through obedience. Obedience, hand in hand with faith, produces a supernatural trigger that propels us to produce fruit that we never thought possible. It goes like this: Jesus calls, we obey (having faith or not is arguably not relevant here), grace empowers us to obey and push past the suffering, producing faith (more if it already existed), a death occurs, a funeral takes place, an inheritance is received (holiness), and the process repeats. This process cannot be void of Jesus, or else it is the law. This process cannot be void of obedience, or we are wishful thinkers waiting for something miraculous. Lastly, this process cannot be void of suffering, or nothing happens.

Suffering, which has historically been synonymous with "passion" in regards to Jesus, is an art form that has arguably been lost. A pendulum swing has taken place where, as Christians, we are at risk of avoiding pain and suffering believing it to be God's will that we always feel good. Let's get one thing straight, suffering and pain does not equal "God is not good". God is good, no matter what. God is less concerned about us being happy and healthy than He is us being made holy (although, I would argue that He would prefer all of the above). God's will is to be connected to us, His children, by any means necessary. He is serious about this. So serious that He sent His one and only Son to die for us. Jesus suffered greater than anything has ever suffered, and will ever suffer. That Suffering produced the only way for us to reconnect with our Divine Dad. That Suffering is what allows us to experience any lasting holiness. Any suffering we experience is but a glimpse of what Jesus Suffered, yet He has allowed us to partake of this so we can experience something greater. Suffering may last for your whole life on earth, but it won't last for one second in eternity. I would make that trade any day.

LIFE'S FIREWORKS OF "YES"

Mon, 28 Oct 2019 02:31:24 GMT

“There’s brilliant colors everywhere, I can’t help by stare. You’re beautiful. And now I know, why the elders cast their crowns and the angels they bow down. Cause now I see your glory. Beautiful beautiful Jesus.” -UPPERROOM

Let’s start by talking about the miracle that is currently taking place… me writing. Not only that but it’s happening in a place of peace while I slowly sip my oat milk cappuccino and let Upperroom worship fill the room with praises singing, “There’s brilliant colors everywhere, I can’t help by stare. You’re beautiful. And now I know, why the elders cast their crowns and the angels they bow down. Cause now I see your glory. Beautiful beautiful Jesus.” Let me back up a second and explain why this is such a miracle for me. You see I have two wonderful and lively (insert needy and loud) kids. One is two and a half and the other six months. The fact that they are both even napping at the same time and in the same room, is a sheer gift from God himself. Time alone in this season happens only at 5 am (on good days when the kids sleep till 6 am.. which is like 10% of the time) or after 8 pm (on good days when the kids go to sleep at 7 pm… which is again 10% of the time). The timing couldn't be more perfect to write as I just got home from an impromptu coffee date, another gift, and my heart wants to process all that just took place before it BURST! Yup, burst. In all the best ways of course. The conversations were spent talking about Japan, family, missions, the call of God, community, taking care of the orphan and how to be the church. As I sat there I could feel my heart shouting “YES!” with much enthusiasm. I had to hold my lips closed to keep it from shouting it out to everything that was being spoken and hold back tears of pure joy. My heart came ALIVE. It was like the presence of God was on every single word and it hit my heart.

As I look back on my life I can see where my yes to the call of God began. It started when I was a young girl as a quiet thing that led me to lay in sweet surrender on the floor for hours at conferences. It then became the very thing that led me to stand to my feet for prayer after missionaries spoke on how Jesus was moving through them in unreached places of the world. It started as a whisper and now has become a shout that is becoming a MOVE. I remember dumping an old boyfriend because he wasn't into missions and I planned to move to an unreached nation, learn the language, and present the gospel which you may have read about on our “why Japan” page where Aaron has his silly interpretation of this. Fast forward to me during my second year of ministry school, laid out on the floor weeping, harder than I ever have before, as Heidi Baker is giving the call for us to completely surrender all of ourselves for all of Him. Leading us to pour everything out and ask Him to fill us with His spirit. I laid there for hours and poured out my heart to Jesus. I felt like the woman who broke her perfume bottle at the feet of Jesus. I believe my yes that day was a sweet fragrance to Him. I gave him my all and it marked me. As I stood up it was with a new level of desire for Him, a louder yes, and also broken blood vessels under my eyes from crying so hard.

Rewind to about 8 months earlier I met my Aaron (seven and a half years ago from today). During the time I was in first year of ministry school in Atlanta, GA and he was working at Bethel Church in Redding, CA. It was the year I went on a missions trip to Africa and I was convinced my mission field would one day be filled with dirt and a hut and cold showers. Aaron soon let me in on his desire and love for Japan. Japan wasn't anywhere on my radar. We began to joke that I was like the people in Africa; warm and friendly and vivacious. Aaron was like the people of Japan; introverted, efficient, and innovative. Complete opposites and a completely different vision for where we felt called. This intrigued me and I decided my mission trip during my second year of ministry school had to be Japan. I needed to know what his passion was all about. If I had to tell you one sentence of what that trip was for me it would be, “The place my heart woke up.” Something awoke in me and hasn't quieted down since. The only explanation is - GOD. The tears and love that flows when I talk or even think about God’s heart for the Japanese people came from left field when I wasn't looking and had to of come from him. His presence shows up every single time.

He is moving in Japan, a nation where less than 1% percent know Jesus, and the call on our family to be apart of this move is something I’ve never been so sure of. With absolute certainty I can say He has called us, He will use us, and He has our yes. My yes has become like fireworks in my heart that are bursting with beautiful color. To me, it points to the very beauty of God that He would give a love like this. Great faith is at work in me as I know us being there will happen despite what our checking account holds in terms of financially being able to go. My yes nowadays looks like movement and surrender. Surrendering plans and control because we have no clue how His vision will play out. We are at a point that If we had the money to go and all paperwork went through, we would sell everything we own today and be on a plane tomorrow. Both thrilling and terrifying but all with absolute certainty that He is breathing on our yes. I’d rather we be in the will of God on the edge of a cliff then outside of it living comfortably because the will of God is the safest place we could be.

The song that was playing when I began this miracle writing session says, “and now I know why the elders cast their crowns and why the angels they bow down. You’re beautiful.” When I hear this song it brings up an interesting question in me - What crowns do I have to throw at his feet? What do I have to give that is costly to me? The answer has never been about possessions for me. It’s my children. They are my jewels, my costly crowns, that I treasure. To say there’s no cost to moving to Japan would be foolish. Everything has a cost. But His worth is beyond anything I have to give and to trust is the invitation. His beauty compels me to cast my crowns.

So here I am with my firework YES. Allowing my heart to speak out loud and others to peer in. I hope you will join us and be moved by all Jesus is doing through our simple - yes. Gotta go, kids are awake ;)

** If you feel led to partner with us in prayer or finances head on over to our connect page. Thank you for joining us on this adventure.

ELLA'S BIRTH STORY

Sun, 27 Oct 2019 02:31:43 GMT

“Control is not peace. Control is not peace. It’s not what it seems.” -Sanctuary by Kalley Heiligenthal

As a little girl, I would tell others that I was going to one day have a supernaturally pain-free homebirth. My mother birthed me in a rented beach house in Fernandina Beach, FL. It was a stormy night right after my parents moved our family from South Carolina. The midwife wasn't able to make it and my dad caught me on the way out and cut the cord. In true redneck style, I was weighed on a produce scale at good ole Publix (not even kidding). Hearing my story as a little girl placed a desire deep within me to one day do the same with my little girl... minus the produce scale. I believed Jesus paid for our pain on the cross and I was praying for a pain-free birth. I’ll go ahead and say it upfront, my labor was far from pain-free, but it brought me more than what I believe a pain-free birth could have.

Ella’s story began at the end of April 2018. I was reading "Keep Your Love On" by Danny Silk early one morning and the end of a particular chapter said, “Ask the Holy Spirit what area in your life you’re being powerless in.” I read that and for some reason immediately thought, "okay I’ll ask that but all He will say is a generic 'you’re being powerless'". When I asked I immediately got a picture of a daisy and felt like He said I was being powerless in the area of pregnancy. I was letting fear and "what ifs" make decisions for me. I looked up the meaning of a daisy and it stands for "new beginnings, motherhood, fertility, and purity". I told Aaron about it and we decided we wanted to start trying and I immediately got my period back the next morning. This was incredible because I was still breastfeeding Liam often and hadn’t had my period since having him. A day or two later I went grocery shopping and picked up a carton of eggs and when I opened it there was a story about a little girl named Daisy. I immediately felt like it would be a girl and knew I wanted to incorporate that into her name. Thus began us trying for baby number two. I was excited because my first fertile time frame was during our anniversary in May and it would've given us a due date around Liam’s birthday making the kids two years apart. A couple of months in, still no pregnancy and an irregular cycle, I began to take maca root powder and using test strips to test for fertility. Sometime in July, I had a dear friend come up to me and say she saw the Lord inviting me to sit at His table and to feast as He was providing all that I could ask or think. To this day I often see Him inviting me to sit at this table. A few weeks later I got my first positive strips. Around the end of July, a wildfire broke out in our city of Redding, CA which led us to evacuate our home on the same day I came down with strep throat. Although it was a very intense few weeks I felt so much peace and thought I was pregnant. I seem to get strep at the beginning of each pregnancy so that gave me a sign of hope amidst the chaos. When we returned home I quickly took a pregnancy test and got positive faint lines. The next 9 months were a bit rough. Exhaustion was at an all-time high. I was often sick and emotional and hanging on by threads of excitement for our baby.

A couple of months into our pregnancy I told Aaron I think I want to have Ella at a local birth center with midwives and do a pool birth. He was a bit confused being we had such a great experience with Liam’s birth at a hospital with an epidural, but he was willing to meet with one of the midwives to discuss what it would look like and ask questions. Walking into the little home downtown, that was used as a birth center, I was certain Aaron would say he wasn't comfortable with it. We toured the home and saw the cozy room and pool where we had the option to have our girl. Thirty minutes later we left with some questions answered, more new questions, and a yes from Aaron. He said he knew this was a desire of mine that he’s heard me talk about often even early on in dating, we knew I had a good labor with Liam with no complications, and we had a small idea of what we were getting ourselves into since it was my second birth. He also said that since we were having a girl and it was our last baby then it would be my last chance to have this dream fulfilled. Shocked, I now had a decision to make. Interestingly his yes brought up hidden fear in me so I didn’t jump on board as fast as I thought I would. The choice was now up to me. After sitting down with Jesus and asking my heart what it was feeling I realized I viewed the hospital as a place of safety and control. Somewhere deep down, I believed that in choosing a hospital I was also choosing a perfect birth within my control and my peace was placed within this lie. I read a post later that day that said something along the lines of, “The enemy is inviting us into control and tells us that it brings peace but Jesus is inviting us into a trust which brings love.” I quickly realized I wasn't in control to begin with, no matter where my birth took place, and that this was an opportunity to trust Jesus and give up my false sense of control. In my time with God, he also gave me a verse that talked about God blessing Sarah with a son named Isaac “Son of Laughter” and making Abraham the father of many. He said he would bless their family and children. I found this so significant and comforting because my name is Sarah AND my last name McKisic means “Son of Laughter”. It felt so close to home and I felt an invitation to trust Him with my birth and children. After this encounter, I gave over my control and gave my yes to having Ella there.

Fast forward to April because my pregnancy was hard in terms of exhaustion and sickness but very smooth and healthy so there’s not much to say there. With chasing around a toddler the time flew by and spring arrived before we knew it. April was a beautiful month in Redding, CA. The gardens were blooming and daisies were sprouting up everywhere. We took many walks and enjoyed the springtime air with lots of anticipation. On April 8th, 5 days before Ella’s due date, someone messaged me on Instagram saying they woke up from their sleep saying, “In this season I will tell Miss Ella about spring and the goodness of God”. This became something I held close and I began to speak to my belly saying, “Come on out Miss Ella, I want to show you the beauty of spring and tell you about the goodness of God.”

On April 9th at 8 pm I began to drive myself and everyone a little nutty with my obsession to have the entire house spotless. Instead of beginning Liam’s bedtime, I started to rearrange the entire downstairs area and deep clean everything. I asked Aaron to bear with me as I knew I was being a little crazy and I told him it would be over soon cause I felt like Ella was coming! The next morning I began having consistent contractions and Aaron took off work. We shared a car so I wanted him to be close in case anything happened. We went for many many walks doing a few miles each time and during these walks, I unpacked my mixed emotions about having a second baby. People don't talk often about the conflict in emotions you experience. One moment it’s immense excitement and the next grief over the chapter closing between you and your firstborn. Another moment you feel ready to embrace this new and exciting territory and a few moments later you want to pause time and hold your once baby who is now so grown. I didn’t expect to be experiencing grief in such an exciting time but once I talked about it, I found out almost every mother experiences this. I embraced it fully and cried when I wanted to cry and just soaked up my time with my boy.

After our last walk at Lema Ranch, I felt the contractions were consistent enough that I got in touch with my midwives and friend who said she’d be my doula. Naomi, my midwife that was on call, had me go home and take a warm bath for 20min. I timed my contractions while relaxing to see if they were slowing down or staying active. I felt they were active and decided to head into the center. Per tradition, we stopped by the local coffee shop for my last cappuccino before baby, this time at Theory Collaborative. Once we arrived she checked to see if I was dilated and I was at about 3cm. She then had us wait a bit so that she could check again and see if I’ve progressed any. This would show if I was in true active labor. I decided to bounce some on the medicine ball and do allllll the lunges (to get her out!). Around 7:30 pm, after 2hrs, she checked again and I hadn’t progressed that much. We were told to head home and do the “midwives cocktail”. I took a specific recipe that would help me sleep if the labor wasn’t the real deal and then only wake up with pain if it was. This would give me time to rest before it truly began. Once we got home we got Liam to sleep and as I held him I allowed myself to weep knowing this was my last time tucking just him in. It was a beautiful moment that felt like closure for that chapter of a family of 3. I took the “cocktail” at 8 pm and went to lay down shortly after. Not to long after 9 pm the contractions were a lot more intense and I felt like I was sweating from the intensity. I figured it should’ve worked by now and felt nothing at all so I gave my doula Rebecca and midwife Naomi a call to let them know I’d like to head back in. I arrived around 9:30 pm and at 9:51 my water broke! We set up the room to be cozy with essential oils that support labor, encouraging music from friends and family that they sent Aaron to play on the google home, and stocked the fridge with all the delicious foods and drinks I brought for us to enjoy during labor! Let’s just say it looked like I was bringing food for a big party! It's important to note that Aaron came through with his humor like he always does and chose the song "Push It" by Salt and Pepper for my labor pump up music. *Insert eye roll* Once my water broke things took off fast and the rest was a rollercoaster!!! My body knew exactly what to do and took over. It felt almost as if I had no control and I had to just trust my body was doing everything well. My blood pressure was dropping a little bit as it does normally throughout pregnancy and labor so I ate some protein to help and they gave me a little bit of oxygen to help with the dizziness. Shortly after this, I went into what they call transition where your hormones change in your body and you enter the next stage of labor. This was one of the most intense parts for me. I won’t go into all the details but let’s just say my body got everything out from both ends at the same time while I was shaking and crying and having intense contractions.... all while my midwife was yelling from the bedroom, “This is so good! Your body is doing exactly what it’s supposed to!” Not sure how long this lasted but it felt like forever. Once that ended Rebecca helped me into the shower and Naomi did some different checks on me and baby. Rebecca showered my body while Aaron let me lean into him for support. My mind and emotions were at a point of having no clue how I could continue. Aaron kept encouraging me that I could do this and that I was doing such a great job. We then decided to move to the pool. I felt a little dizzy so we made the pool a little cooler and Rebecca fanned me with a towel so that I had some air in my face. Aaron got in with me in his bathing suit (which if you know him then you know this was an ultimate act of love!) and he held the barf bucket. Pure romance, right?! I got into the most comfortable position on my knees leaning into Aaron for his steadiness and support. Rebecca locked eyes with me while continuing to fam air into my face and talked me through contractions. She seriously carried me so far and helped me get through labor. (Bec if you’re reading this, thank you endlessly! You are such a pillar of strength and beauty!) Anyways my body continued to run the show as it began pushing on its own accord, my emotions took a back seat and my screaming ... well, it was loud. Ha! Not sure how many pushes later cause it took me a bit to relax and assist my body but maybe 3 or 4 later out came Ella's head! Naomi asked if Aaron wanted to feel it and he did! (We came along way since being offered that when I was birthing Liam haha) Her head being out was such a relief and with one more push and a small tear out came her body. Naomi caught her and then laid her on my chest as Aaron held us both and I cried happy tears!! Three of the most insane hours of my life and she was finally here. Ella Daisy McKisic was born Thursday 4/11/19 at 12:45 am at 8lbs 1oz and 21inches! We all played a game to guess her weight and I was the most off. I was sure she would weigh less than her brother but he was a couple weeks early so she had extra time to chunk up. Ella pretty quickly went to nurse and latched so well. I ate some food after that wild workout, did skin to skin with Ella to bond, Aaron cut the cord after a couple of hours, and then they did some exams on Ella and me before sending us home. Around 4 am we headed home and it was as if Liam knew because he was up waiting for us when we arrived. We had him come into the room to meet his new sissy and she gave him a gift that he LOVED. She got him a Puffin Rock book. The recovery for her birth was incredible. My body felt really good and I didn’t have much pain or dizzy spells. I was healing quickly. The worst was the postpartum cramping that was about as bad as labor contractions for a couple days as my uterus contracted back down to the correct size! We took the next week slow and I let others serve me as I cuddled my new little love. Last time with Liam I prided myself on how quickly I was able to get out of the house and this time it was in how well I rested and let my body heal. A few days after Ella was born Aaron walked into the room saying, “I think we should have two more.” To this day that makes me smile because I know that’s Aaron's way of saying he likes her. (Not sure about the two more kids part though.) The midwives visited our house a few times after the birth within the first couple of weeks to check on baby and I! It was a wonderful experience to be able to rest and heal in my own home. My mother in law became Liams new best friend and they did lots of fun hangouts and activities! My mom came into town from Georgia and blessed us with so many delicious home-cooked meals and our friends lavished us with more food and even more beer haha! (Someone once said it’s good for breast milk supply, thanks to that someone).

Ella’s birth rushed me into new found freedoms and trust in the Lord. I traded him my control and in turn, he gave me the most beautiful gift. Ella means light and beauty. Daisy means purity, motherhood, and new beginnings. McKisic means son of laughter. I feel like Ella Daisy will radiate beauty, light, purity, joy, and motherhood! Her love will change many lives and offer a safe place to those in need. She will walk others into freedom and trust. I can’t wait to watch her life unfold. I know that day of choosing to partner with God to be powerful and embrace love over fear was for good reason. She will be a force to be reckoned with. She will be warm and inviting yet fierce and strong!

** Ella, for when you read this one day, thanks for taking my hand and leading me into trust and belief in myself and God. You are cherished and one my life’s greatest accomplishments. We love you, sissy!

LIAM'S BIRTH STORY

Sun, 27 Oct 2019 02:31:29 GMT

"This is going to be the best day of my life. My life." -American Authors

The hours surrounding both my baby's births are ones that will forever be etched into my memory. They fill my mind with fondness. I don’t want to ever let them leave. So here I will sit, let it all flood back to the front of my mind and let the words flood onto the page.

February 1st, 2017 - the day my first baby came into the world, my boy, Liam Archer McKisic. But this isn’t where his story began. May 2016 was a busy month. I flew home from a trip to GA on May 7th, just to jump on another flight the next morning to Japan with my husband for our 1st anniversary. We spent a wonderful week and a half exploring Tokyo. As soon as we were back on American soil I was off again to celebrate my youngest sister graduating high school in GA. While on this trip I found out about LIAM! And boy was it a surprise. My mom and I were sitting in the kitchen waiting for all the other siblings to arrive. She looked at my wedding ring that slid around on my finger and said, “Don’t you think you should get that sized before it falls off?” My response was, “I guess I could, but if I ever get pregnant I’ve heard your fingers can swell so I may as well leave it.” She excitedly responded with, “Does that mean you could be pregnant?! Your sister has been trying so I have a pregnancy test in the closet I was saving for her when she arrives but you have to take it RIGHT NOW!” I replied, “Well we aren’t trying but we also aren’t not trying?! I’ve always wanted to be a mom so I’ll be excited if and when it happens.” She quickly poured me a glass of water and made me drink it and then refilled it up. Within 5 minutes I was nervously in the bathroom peeing on a pregnancy test. The positive line came back IMMEDIATELY. With a shock, I walked out and didn’t even have the words to say before my mom grabbed the test and started yelling in excitement… and I began crying. Looking back on it, it makes me laugh. At that moment I was afraid because I was the one working and Aaron was a full-time student. My mom ran to her bookshelf and grabbed the baby's name book and started running through name ideas. I was so overwhelmed that my little sister who wanted to respond with excitement stood there with a concerned look on her face wondering if I was okay. (seriously this makes me laugh). I walked out back and called Aaron who was back home in Ohio. He immediately said he thought I was and that he was very excited and knew we could make it all work out. Relief rushed over me. Excitement began to grow. I had been given two due dates with Liam from different places. One was set for January 29th, day after Aaron’s birthday and also the same date I first talked to Aaron 5 years earlier! The second date we were given from our actual OB when I was about 11 weeks pregnant was for Feb 12th and that was the date we were going with for my real due date. Fast forward to October that year. My boss at Chick-fil-A created a new position that would allow me to create my schedule and work from home. I’d always heard God loves children and children bring blessings. Boom blessing number one placed before us! Fast forward one more time to when I was 8 months pregnant. It was sometime during the first week of January I went in for a usual checkup. They measured my belly and were concerned with how small I was. They started telling me that Liam would probably be a premie under the 5th percentile in weight and need to be born at a bigger hospital that had a NICU unit and that I would have to deliver with different doctors from that hospital. I surprisingly wasn’t afraid and had so much peace. I went in a couple of days later for an ultrasound to check on him and he was measuring above the 50th percentile!! On January 31st I woke up around 2 am with mild contractions but quickly fell back asleep. I went in the next morning for a 38-week appointment and found out I was a few cm dilated but was told you can be this dilated for weeks and nothing happens. I carried about my day as normal and headed into Chick-fil-A for work. We had a really important meeting that morning with people from the corporate office who were coming to interview us for a second store. I sat down with the other managers and the corporate leaders and one asked me, “So when are you due to have your baby?” and I jokingly replied, “Could be any moment now.” But I didn’t let them know that although joking there was also a lot of truth to that answer. The day continued with me having mild contractions here and there and I was the “runner” that day who brought food to the guest. Lots and lots of walking happened for hours. Around 3:30 pm, while I was the one leading the shift, I noticed the contractions were getting stronger and closer together. I borrowed my friends fit bit to keep track of how often they were happening and how close together they were. Periodically I would stop walking while carrying out food and breathe through the pain. Thirty minutes passed and they had been three minutes apart and lasting a full minute each time. I walked back to the office where my general managers and operator were and told them I needed to leave and have someone else take over the last portion of my shift. They all laughed and said I probably wasn’t in real labor and that it was Braxton hicks. I called up Aaron to come pick me up and once I got home called my OB. They had me continue timing it for another half hour. While Aaron packed up the car I took a shower, blew my hair dry, straightened it, did my makeup, and shaved my legs. I joke now about that cause man did I have a lot of time on my hands to “pamper” myself. And yes time alone shaving my legs and showering is a full-on spa day to me. Kidding but not really. As the contractions continued getting stronger we decided to head into the hospital. I had Aaron stop at Claro Coffee Bar to get me my last cappuccino and take a last belly photo. The entire time Aaron kept saying he didn’t believe I was in real labor because I was too calm and not yelling.

We got to Labor and Delivery at St. Luke’s Hospital in Maumee, OH around 630pm. After a few tests, they determined I was 3cm dilated and in active labor to which I gave Aaron a look across the room that said: “told ya so”. One of the nurses noticed and asked what my look was about and I told them we were having a bet on if this was labor or not. They checked us into a room and so it began. I went into labor very “uneducated” if you may. I didn’t research a thing, read any books, write a birth plan or even tour the hospital. The closest tour we got was when I went in at 32 weeks to have Liam’s heart rate monitored due to me not feeling him moving for a long period. Little did I know that was just pure personality - chillest of chill little dude. Still is. I sobbed the entire way there thinking every worst-case scenario while I heard God’s voice reassuring me that it would be okay. I tried to collect myself as we walked into the hospital and took some deep breaths. At that checkup, a midwife named Erika came in and very peacefully said, “As soon as I put this monitor on you I’m sure he will begin kicking. They always do. So what will his name be?” To which I nervously smiled and told her, “Liam”. She never forgot his name and always carried that level of calmness, that left an impression on me. Seconds before she placed the monitor on me I felt a little kick... insert eye roll and big sighs of relief. We left thankful and joked that at least we now knew where to go when the time came. From then on I began praying I’d have her on call when I went into labor and sure enough she was! After finishing up paperwork once checked into our room for the delivery they began an IV as a “just in case” I wanted to get an epidural. The contractions continued picking up. Aaron was very fascinated by the monitor that showed my contractions go up and flat line at the top from being so high and then go back down. He asked lots of questions to the nurses about everything that was happening with much interest. Such an Aaron thing. Pain was at a very manageable place so I found this cute. Around midnight I was about 6cm and at a point of being able to breathe threw the pain but ready to sleep so I asked for an epidural. They had someone needing an emergency c-section so they said it would be a little bit before they could get to me. They went ahead and put some pain meds in my IV. I felt immediate relief. I was joking with all the nurses all night that I was going to get them some free Chick-fil-A once this was done and one nurse told everyone that I was so calm because I do yoga. It made me laugh because I don’t. About an hour later they came in and did my epidural and we began to tuck in for some sleep for the night. By this point, I wasn't feeling any contractions and became sort of a diva. I was annoyed with the way the monitors felt on my skin and the itchiness that covered my belly. The needle in my arm providing my fluids was uncomfortable and about every half hour my low blood pressure monitor would go off. It didn’t fit my small arm so it went off often. When this happened I had to try and find the button to call the nurse so she could come to turn it off but I was all tangled in wires and monitors so it made reaching for it difficult. Aaron by this point was passed out and I’m pretty sure I tried to throw a pillow at him to wake him up and find the button for me a few times. This is where I learned that Aaron was a hard sleeper and my diva self was a bit annoyed that I kept getting woken up. Around 3 am I had a wave of anxiety rush over me at not being able to feel the bottom half of my body. Aaron was pretty far away asleep on the futon and I couldn't move to wake him so I began to pray and worship. It soon passed and I was able to get back to resting. Around 4 or 5 am they came in with a peanut ball to put between my legs as I lay on my side so that they could get Liam’s head to drop further down. Erika came in at 6:30 am to check my progress, found I was fully dilated and accidentally broke my water. She told me it was time to begin pushing. She left the room to get everything she needed and I quickly touched up my makeup and sent out a few texts letting people know he was coming! and yes I did my makeup… makes me laugh so much now. Some of my friends were all texting me letting me know they couldn't get into the restaurant to open so I replied with a photo of me and said: “I am about to have a baby and about to begin pushing.” I had a mirror placed in front of me so I could see the progress I was making while pushing and Erika coached me through the whole thing. A few minutes in Erika asked if she could do an episiotomy. I didn’t know what that was but trusted her to make the best choice for me so I said yes. She said she thought I would tear without one. It was getting close to 7 am when she was off and needing to leave to get her kids to school. Looking back and now knowing more about episiotomies I’m not sure if it was to speed things up or not but I’d like to believe she had the best intentions for me. She did it and we soon saw the top of his head to which she asked if we wanted to touch it and we quickly said no thanks. (haha) Another push and his whole head came out. Aaron and I both began LAUGHING. He looked like an alien and it was the craziest thing we have ever seen. With one last push his whole body came out and I began crying happy tears. At 6:51 am, after 6min of pushing, our entire world changed forever. He was 21inches long and 7lbs 12oz of perfection. I say this was the moment a new joy rushed into the room.

Aaron quickly seized the moment and made what we now call - his first dad joke. “Now Sarah has officially delivered twice to you guys,” he said. (I had once delivered them Chick-fil-A chicken and now a baby) Like I said dad joke. Anyways they put Liam directly on my chest and his cries were the best thing my ears have ever heard. I don’t remember the rest of the delivery after that. I don’t remember any blood, the delivery of the placenta or the stitches. I just remember him on my chest looking me in the eyes. They did a delayed cord clamping where I cut the cord. Then they checked all of his vitals while I was doing skin to skin with him. He was doing so well they just left him on me and never took him away to a nursery to be checked. He found his way to my right breasts and began nursing. Soon after this both of our mothers came into the room to see their new grandson for the first time. It was a very special moment to have them there with us at the hospital. After a few hours, they took him to do skin to skin with his daddy. I felt amazing. Since I didn’t feel anything I didn’t realize how much my body went through. I asked if I could get up to use the restroom and shower. As I got up and walked to the bathroom I felt very light-headed. Once I sat down I looked at the nurse assisting me and told her that I was going to pass out. I blacked out and it scared the nurse so much she pulled the entire emergency cord out of the wall. Many nurses and a Dr. flooded the room where Aaron couldn't move cause he was shirtless with Liam laying on his chest. He knew I’d be fine because this wasn't the first time I’ve passed out. The Dr. began asking me questions to make sure I was okay and then I was assisted back to the bed. I then was given a red bracelet that labeled me as “High Risk”. The nurse I had at that point made a scolding type of comment that she had trusted me that I was ready to get up and that she wasn't going to let me up anytime soon because I broke that trust. I felt embarrassed and cried. Not sure if it was just a surge of hormones that made me take the comment that way but that’s how I remember it going. Memories are a funny thing. Anyways I was soon given an iron pill to up my blood supply and FOOD. They brought me two servings of pasta from the cafe downstairs and I quickly felt better. I also was allowed up to shower with my moms' assistance and that made me feel ready to conquer it all. As the day progressed Aaron decided to leave with my mom to get us coffee from Claro. Once he got back and had his first cup the nurses taught us how to soothe Liam with a swaddle. Aaron looked at me and said, “Okay… I think I can do this. Coffee and swaddles are all I need.”

The first night in the hospital I was so starving from breastfeeding I asked the nurse to order me a hamburger and fries. I guess they were not taking calls between 1- 3 am and stopped delivering food to the rooms so my sweet nurse took my order on pen and paper and went and picked me up food. She made a joke that she felt like a server. That was when I started dreaming of having a stocked up mini-fridge in the nursery for those midnight hunger moments and searched Pinterest for ideas. Yes, I did that. Breastfeeding hunger is no joke. The nurses I had were amazing and the couple days that followed were full of laughs and jokes and some tears from exhaustion and crazy hormones. The days felt packed with learning and pampering so when they came in on Thursday morning asking if we’d want to go home we weren't sure. We talked and I didn’t feel peace about leaving yet so we decided to stay one more night.

On the second night, I woke Liam up after 3hrs to feed him and he was very lethargic. He wouldn't eat no matter what I did. The nurses came in and tried to get him to wake and eat as well and decided to take him from the room to check his bilirubin levels. While Liam was in the nursery to get his bilirubin levels tested Aaron went in to sit by him. He later told me it felt like he was hanging out with some bros making jokes and he felt beer should've been had. Again just like Aaron to be winning others over with his humor and chillness. They determined Liam’s bilirubin levels were high and put him under a light in our room. Our worries quickly faded as we saw nurses pass our room making comments like, “Aw baby's first vacation on the beach” or “Look he’s having his first tanning session.” Their silly remarks made us realize he would be okay and that they were not concerned. During his time under the light, maybe 12hrs, I had a moment of breaking down. The nurses chose to take Liam out of the room and told me I had to take a nap. I remember my brain felt wired and like I couldn't shut it down and sleep. So instead I rested for 2hrs and had a good heart to heart with Aaron. Later that day the breastfeeding consultant came in along with many Drs doing checks on me and baby. The consultant was incredible and we learned so much from her. By mid-afternoon, on Friday we were told Liam was doing good enough to go home and to continue giving him sunlight at home. With much peace, we headed home with our new bundle. As soon as we got home Aaron headed out to get me my first sushi in 9 months!

I’d like to think that Liam’s birth is also a lot like who he is today - calm, chill, joyful, humorous, and filling rooms with love and compassion.

* Liam, I hope one day when you read this you know that the day you entered our lives you marked us and every day since has been the best adventure we could've ever embarked on. Thanks for being you. You will always be enough and be my boy of joy. We love you, which isn't hard at all.